# Left hand VS right hand briskets



## ydnark (May 26, 2004)

I had an expert (sic: has-been drip under pressure) try to tell me that he only buys left hand briskets. His reasoning went something like this: all but a very few cows are right handed, therefore when they get up from laying down they get up on their right side first. This makes the right side briskets tougher than the left side. Now, I have heard of folding the briskets before buying them and only buying the ones that you can get to touch on the ends, but this seems like a bunch of hooey to me...

Input?


----------



## RB II (Feb 26, 2009)

Don't know about left hand briskets but do know that cows get up on their back feet first. Which means that most of the weight is up when they use their front feet. Never noticed that they were right or left handed.


----------



## Bocephus (May 30, 2008)

Sometimes if you look really hard you can find an ambidextrous brisket. If you can find one of those your gonna eat one of the best briskets you've ever put in your piehole.


----------



## bassguitarman (Nov 29, 2005)

I honestly don't remember shaking hands with a cow. That's not to say I haven't done it - I just don't remember doing it......................


----------



## DANO (May 23, 2005)

Bocephus said:


> Sometimes if you look really hard you can find an ambidextrous brisket. If you can find one of those your gonna eat one of the best briskets you've ever put in your piehole.





bassguitarman said:


> I honestly don't remember shaking hands with a cow. That's not to say I haven't done it - I just don't remember doing it......................


:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:


----------



## 24Buds (Dec 5, 2008)

Bocephus said:


> Sometimes if you look really hard you can find an ambidextrous brisket. If you can find one of those your gonna eat one of the best briskets you've ever put in your piehole.


That is the truth!



bassguitarman said:


> I honestly don't remember shaking hands with a cow. That's not to say I haven't done it - I just don't remember doing it......................


 Cows don't have hands. I have shook hooves with a cow before, but I was young. We had a few beers and she went on her way.sad3sm


----------



## chapman53559 (Jun 19, 2009)

It sounds like a scape goat in case his meat doesn't turn out right. "That darn H E B was out of left hand briskets that's why it's tuff".
Are pigs right handed too most of the time? I grill more pork cause it's free.


----------



## castaway300 (Oct 6, 2007)

people ask me why i laugh so much at work.... i tell them to get on 2cool and read threads like this ....left handed cows
oh yea i only fish for right eye dominant fish...they can see the bait better...


----------



## chapman53559 (Jun 19, 2009)

oh yea i only fish for right eye dominant fish...they can see the bait better... 
Dido.


----------



## Tate (Aug 25, 2005)

ydnark said:


> I had an expert (sic: has-been drip under pressure) try to tell me that he only buys left hand briskets. His reasoning went something like this: all but a very few cows are right handed, therefore when they get up from laying down they get up on their right side first. This makes the right side briskets tougher than the left side. Now, I have heard of folding the briskets before buying them and only buying the ones that you can get to touch on the ends, but this seems like a bunch of hooey to me...
> 
> Input?


I heard it was because they typically lay on their right side. I am not sure if that is statistically reasonable.

Tate


----------



## sotol buster (Oct 7, 2007)

castaway300 said:


> people ask me why i laugh so much at work.... i tell them to get on 2cool and read threads like this ....left handed cows
> oh yea i only fish for right eye dominant fish...they can see the bait better...


I don't care too much except for flounder, then it makes a HUGE difference.


----------



## bigbob (Jul 5, 2009)

24Buds said:


> That is the truth!
> 
> Cows don't have hands. I have shook hooves with a cow before, but I was young. We had a few beers and she went on her way.sad3sm


Did Ya eat her?


----------



## jrcjr (Aug 9, 2005)

*?*

How can you tell if its a righty or lefty?


----------



## rookie06 (Oct 1, 2005)

Then I guess it would stand to reason not to eat the meat off the black cows. Since they're black, they attract more sun, therefore "pre"cooking them slightly more than the other colors?!?!?!?!?!?!?:dance:


----------



## CptnKris (Feb 27, 2006)

Wow! Left handed brisket, I suppose he has a specific direction for fat side up or down depending on the gravitational pull of the moon during summer compared to winter cooking. You should also check if the elevation in the pit makes a difference from 1 ft higher above sea level.


----------



## Jigger (Feb 12, 2009)

Dont forget about ambient temperature and barometric pressure!!

BBR


----------



## Bretticu$ (May 9, 2006)

I tried to feed a cow a hamburger once, ungrateful thing wouldn't have it. I even put cheese on it! sad2sm


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

bassguitarman said:


> I honestly don't remember shaking hands with a cow. That's not to say I haven't done it - I just don't remember doing it......................


lol... never figured to shake a cows hoof.. but I have been kicked once or twice.. cant remember if it was left or right.. just remember it didnt feel as awesome as you would think... :spineyes:


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

jrcjr said:


> How can you tell if its a righty or lefty?


Walk up really fast behind it... see above response to justify how I know.. :biggrin:


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

castaway300 said:


> people ask me why i laugh so much at work.... i tell them to get on 2cool and read threads like this ....left handed cows
> oh yea i only fish for right eye dominant fish...they can see the bait better...


CASTAWAY... stop it... your killin me...:rotfl:


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

*SouthPaw Pork*



chapman53559 said:


> It sounds like a scape goat in case his meat doesn't turn out right. "That darn H E B was out of left hand briskets that's why it's tuff".
> Are pigs right handed too most of the time? I grill more pork cause it's free.


You mean to tell me you've never heard of "SouthPaw Pork" :spineyes: lol

Yea, next time you need to double check before you shoot to make sure it is left handed.. that way it will be more tender...

I know your going to worry about his next time your in the stand but try and relax.. take your time.. and pick out a southpaw... :slimer:

-Sweat


----------



## CoastalOutfitters (Aug 20, 2004)

I know they were trying to genetically engineer "slope cattle" a few years back to graze on the steep mountain sides, one sides legs were shorter, they just couldn't turn around


----------



## jdot7749 (Dec 1, 2008)

If you believe that you need to get some left hand wrenches to work on your pit, board stretchers and nail splitters for your home improvement projects and all the other rookie stuff you've ever heard of.


----------



## jdot7749 (Dec 1, 2008)

Oh, by the way, don't eat that Herman, it might be horse sh*#.


----------



## seahorse5 (May 27, 2007)

jdot7749 said:


> If you believe that you need to get some left hand wrenches to work on your pit, board stretchers and nail splitters for your home improvement projects and all the other rookie stuff you've ever heard of.


A well equipped shop also has a sky hook, metric Phillips screwdrivers, and a glass hammer.


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

seahorse5 said:


> A well equipped shop also has a sky hook, metric Phillips screwdrivers, and a glass hammer.


Yea... dont forget the electric motor oil, blinker fluid, and level oil..!!:headknock


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

*Glass Hammer*

Here it is SeaHorse in all its GLORY....!!


----------



## seahorse5 (May 27, 2007)

Is that a metric, Whitworth, or SAE size hammer?


----------



## w_r_ranch (Jan 14, 2005)

ydnark said:


> I had an expert (sic: has-been drip under pressure) try to tell me that he only buys left hand briskets. His reasoning went something like this: all but a very few cows are right handed, therefore when they get up from laying down they get up on their right side first. This makes the right side briskets tougher than the left side. Now, I have heard of folding the briskets before buying them and only buying the ones that you can get to touch on the ends, but this seems like a bunch of hooey to me...?


Yep I agree, it is a bunch of hooey... That so-called expert is full of chit.


----------



## Jigger (Feb 12, 2009)

brake grease
muffler bearings
and my favorite... no oil...It goes in special designed gauges...you know the ones that say use no oil.

BBR


----------



## Jigger (Feb 12, 2009)

and as far as level oil. We call that stuff mineral spirits. At the race shop we call that a spirit level.

BBR


----------



## Coast Rider (Aug 29, 2010)

Bocephus said:


> Sometimes if you look really hard you can find an ambidextrous brisket. If you can find one of those your gonna eat one of the best briskets you've ever put in your piehole.


Too Funny........Don't think it matters, you been sent on a snipe hunt.


----------



## USAFDAD (Apr 5, 2008)

I do know that cows want us to eat more chicken.


----------



## Mrschasintail (Dec 8, 2004)

That's about 3 minutes, I'll never get back.


----------



## Worthy 2 Keep (Sep 2, 2009)

You guys are killing me, so I had to do a search

Restaurant kitchens or catering

A bucket of steam
A square rolling pin
The bacon stretcher (it's a little metal thing with bars, ask to borrow one next door)
A rice peeler (we make ours from scratch)
A tub of elbow grease
A dough repair kit
A bucket of light sauce
A left handed pizza peel
The colander with no holes
A tin (or can) of chicken lips
Two pounds of salmon legs
A strawberry peeler
Powdered water
Lightbulb grease (fixes burned-out bulbs)
Canned heat
Pot dividers
A pan stretcher ("You weren't supposed to run that pan through the dishwasher, now it's shrunk. Go get the pan stretcher to stretch it back out.")
A glass magnet (to clean shards of broken glass from a sink)
A mince hook (supposedly for hanging up mince)
Asking the trainee to chop flour (usually being told it is to some end such as "to release the gluten")
Asking the trainee to find the squeegee sharpener.
Asking the trainee to wash the dirty water
Asking the trainee to mop the freezer (wet mops like to stick to the cold metal)
Asking the trainee to go get more sesame seeds for the buns
Asking a trainee to drain the hot water from the coffee maker (the orange valve connected to the tap; done "to keep the heating element from rusting. Very expensive to fix.")
Hot Dog buns at McDonalds
There are plenty of others broken down by occupation on the link.
http://www.statemaster.com/encyclopedia/Snipe-hunt

Wasn't there a "fake" website that one could "buy" a few things that showed images of the product somewhere?


----------



## Haute Pursuit (Jun 26, 2006)

Do you tell whether it is a left hand or right hand brisket from in front of her or behind her???


----------



## Farmer Jim (May 21, 2004)

I had heard of this left hand brisket thing before and I tried several. They always turned out terrible and I decided that it was just a bunch of BS. Then I bought a left handed pit and you wouldn't believe the difference that matching them up has made. I'll never have another right handed pit or buy another right handed brisket. Now I'm looking for a source for left handed mesquite. I figure that will be the final step in brisket perfection.


----------



## El Cazador (Mar 4, 2005)

Sweat said:


> lol... never figured to shake a cows hoof.. but I have been kicked once or twice.. cant remember if it was left or right.. just remember it didnt feel as awesome as you would think... :spineyes:


I've never see a cow kick with it front legs before..._that's_ pretty cool


----------



## Sweat (Jun 1, 2010)

El Cazador said:


> I've never see a cow kick with it front legs before..._that's_ pretty cool


You might not believe me but I was actually trying to see if he was left or right handed and the SOB kicked me with its front legs...:clover:

Actually have the footage on video... 



 check it out.. :brew2:


----------



## dhingle (Feb 10, 2006)

hold the brisket with the point away from you, curved edge down. if outides cover of fat is on rt then right sided. if meaty side on right then left-sided.


----------



## sweenyite (Feb 22, 2009)

Worthy 2 Keep said:


> You guys are killing me, so I had to do a search
> 
> Restaurant kitchens or catering
> 
> ...


On the aircraft carrier, we used to send guys to the flight deck to borrow a bucket of prop wash or get some flight line, send them to the parariggers to get some fallopian tube. When you are new on a navy ship, everything and everyone kind of looks the same. So, we'd make up a milspec number for an imaginary type of grease and send them to a workcenter to get it. We'd call ahead and let them know and they would say they were fresh out and send them somewhere else and so on. Sometimes the poor recruit would visit the same compartment several times and not recognize it.


----------



## sweenyite (Feb 22, 2009)

Anybody got a metric pipe wrench I could borrow? How about a metric crescent wrench?


----------

