# Article: Stung Through Betrayal.



## daparson (Dec 4, 2004)

All of us at one time or another have felt the sting of betrayal. Right now is one such time for me.

I dug out this lesson I taught years ago and let it speak to my own heart. Thought I might share it with you - for all of us at one time have been betrayed and will be again.


*(Matthew 26:14-16 NIV) "Then one of the Twelve--the one called Judas Iscariot--went to the chief priests {15} and asked, "What are you willing to give me if I hand him over to you?" So they counted out for him thirty silver coins. {16} From then on Judas watched for an opportunity to hand him over." 
*

*(Matthew 26:47-50 NIV) "While he was still speaking, Judas, one of the Twelve, arrived. With him was a large crowd armed with swords and clubs, sent from the chief priests and the elders of the people. {48} Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: "The one I kiss is the man; arrest him." {49} Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, "Greetings, Rabbi!" and kissed him. {50} Jesus replied, "Friend, do what you came for." Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested him."

* Betrayal is a weapon found only in the hands of the ones you love. Your enemy has no such tool, for only a friend can betray. Betrayal is a violation of trust, an inside job. It would be easier if it was a stranger, a random attack or that you were a victim of circumstance. But betrayal isn't like that. When you are betrayed, you are the victim of a friend.

It is more than rejection. Rejection opens a wound, betrayal pours the salt.
It's more than loneliness. Loneliness leaves you in the cold, betrayal closes the door.
It is more than mockery. Mockery plunged the knife, betrayal twists it.
It is more than as insult. An insult attacks your pride, betrayal breaks your heart.

When betrayal comes, what do you do? Get out? Get angry? Get even? You have to deal with it somehow. How did Jesus treat being betrayed.


*I. JESUS CALLED JUDAS FRIEND*

*(Matthew 26:50 NIV) "Jesus replied, "Friend, do what you came for." Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested him."*

Of all the names I would have chosen for Judas it would have not been friend. What Judas did was grossly unfair. There is no indication that Jesus ever mistreated Judas. There is no clue that Judas was ever left out or neglected. When, during the Last Supper, Jesus told the disciple that His betrayer sat at the table, they didn't turn to one another and whisper, "It's Judas. Jesus told us he would do that!"

It is even more unfair when you consider that they betrayal was Judas's idea. The religious leaders didn't seek him, Judas sought them. Judas went to them and asked how much he could get for Jesus. Somehow the betrayal might have been more palatable or understandable if Judas had been propositioned by the leader, but he wasn't. He propositioned them.

Then he betrayed Him by calling Him Teacher - a title of respect. Then the kiss - an exchange between friends - a expression of affection. Nothing that Judas said or did warranted such a response from Jesus. 


*II. JESUS KNEW THAT JUDAS HAD BEEN SEDUCED BY A POWERFUL FOE*

Jesus was aware of Satan's whispers in Judas's ear. He was aware how powerful and cunning they could be. After all, Jesus had heard them for Himself. This was no demon or even demons that was after Judas, this was Satan himself.

Jesus knew how hard it was for Judas to do what was right. He didn't justify what Judas did. He didn't minimize the deed. Not did He release Judas from his choice. But He did look eye to eye with His betrayer and try to understand. As long as you hate your betrayer, a jail door is closed and a prisoner is taken. But when you try to understand and release your foe from your hatred, then the prisoner is released and that prisoner is you.

Perhaps you don't like that idea. Perhaps the thought of forgiveness is unrealistic to you. Perhaps the idea of trying to understand your Judases is simply to gracious.

What do you suggest? Does harboring anger solve the problem? Will getting even remove the hurt? Does hatred do any good? The hurt should not be minimized, nor should one justify the actions of a betrayer, but we must understand that justice won't come this side of eternity and demanding that your betrayer gets his or hers share of pain. will in the process, be most painful to you. Life is not fair. God never said that it would be.

*(John **16:33** NIV) ""I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.""*

Troubles are part of the package. As long as you are here on earth there are going to be betrayals, disappointments, death, sickness and sin. That is all part of the troubles and tribulation that come with living here on planet earth. Don't look for fairness here - look instead where Jesus looked. *
*

*III. JESUS LOOKED TO THE FUTURE*

*(Matthew 26:64 NIV) ""Yes, it is as you say," Jesus replied. "But I say to all of you: In the future you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of the Mighty One and coming on the clouds of heaven.""*

While going through hell on earth, Jesus kept His Eyes of heaven.
While surrounded by enemies, He kept His Mind of His Father.
While abandoned on earth, He kept His Heart on Home.

Jesus took a long look into the homeland. Long enough to see His friends.

*(Matthew 26:53 NIV) "Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels?"*

And seeing them up there gave Him strength here on earth. 


So what should we do when we are Betrayed?

*I. JESUS CALLED JUDAS FRIEND - *Offer them Compassion. 
*II. JESUS KNEW THAT JUDAS HAD BEEN SEDUCED BY A POWERFUL FOE - *Offer them Understanding. 
*III. JESUS LOOKED TO THE FUTURE - *Keep your Eyes Focused on Jesus Christ.

*(Hebrews 12:1-2 NIV) "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. {2} Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."*

 I can't do this - it's impossible!

*Philippians **4:13** "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."*

One of the things I love about God's Word is that just because it is difficult, unpleasant, even counter-intuitive at times - God doesn't change His standards. This lesson isn't pleasant - but it is true none the less.

Still Stinging

Mark


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## tropicalsun (May 21, 2004)

*Betrayal*

Must be something going around, Mark. Had to pull a knife out of my back a couple of times this week. Makes for a difficult day when you don't know who you can trust...but God is bigger than all this...and thanks for sermon outline. Mind if I preach it?

God bless,
Rob


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## daparson (Dec 4, 2004)

*Yes*



tropicalsun said:


> Must be something going around, Mark. Had to pull a knife out of my back a couple of times this week. Makes for a difficult day when you don't know who you can trust...but God is bigger than all this...and thanks for sermon outline. Mind if I preach it? God bless,Rob


 Be my guest Rob. I believe this comes with the territory ... still ... stings.

Mark


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## Freshwaterman (May 21, 2004)

Quite amazing that you posted and I read this. I got stabbed in the back at work, Friday and have been plotting a return volley ever since.

So I will reconsider. Thank you LORD for showing me the way.


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## fridayfisher (Aug 6, 2004)

God's Word has been opened today. Amen? 
Parson, though I have not experienced betrayal lately and I pray no one can say that about me (lately) I read this with my heart.
While I personally prefer the King James I love Hebrews.
When I was 20 I was a machinst in the steelworkers union. Had a problem once and the local guy was a company man who couldnt do me any good. When the Union rep came in and stood up for me I got my job back. When I first read Hebrews _ Hebrews 12:1-2 NIV) "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. {2} Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

It says the Author and finisher. The steelworkers contract wasn't that strong.I said to a pastor one time he ought to do backflips when he spoke that scripture. 
God bless you.


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## harvey/mary (Apr 2, 2006)

I have experienced HARSLY back in the LATE 80's early 90's when, without the story details, lost a 3 yr. old daughter from this earth. I wanted more than ANYTHING to literally take two peoples lives....but the life of another daughter, which od used to keep ME alive.....I did not take matters into my own hands...and God reminded me of the verse that He siad...give a drink of cold water to your thirsty enimy, and it will be like hot coals on their heads.........paraphrased.......and let God take care of the wrong doer and not repay evil for evil....Well...back when this happened......I cursed God and left Him...harshly. ..During this time, as I look back now....You do NOT lose your salvation...but you do lose your peace and fellowship with God. I have seen, in may ways and forms...that God did...has...and STILL is taking care of that "pay back" in many more ways than I ever could have dreamed of. God is SO faithful and True and loving to His Born Again Children.....and I am SOOOOO thankful to Him that I did not do any of the things I wanted to do. Seeing things today, they way God has done "things" really helps to stand on His Word....Blind Faith is not so blind these days..!!!!!!!!!!!!! God has been, is...and forever will be SO GOOD ALL THE TIME..!!!!!!!!! I give Him all the praise...honor...and Glory...through His precious Son, Jesus Christ !!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## TXPalerider (May 21, 2004)

Thanks Mark,

I have had similar feelings of betrayal in the last week. It is so true, only a friend can do that to you. And it does hurt.


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## daparson (Dec 4, 2004)

*Its Monday*

Anytime you care/love in a relationship - there is a possibility for betrayal. Work, family, marriage, church, friendship, etc - wherever there are relationships - betrayal can occur.

Knowing that I think there are three options

1. You can eliminate/limit your exposure to betrayal by shutting down or not having relationships. Be a loner - self-sufficient - don't need anyone - don't trust anyone - build an impenetrable shield around your heart. Sounds safe - but lonely in the end.

2. Trust everybody all the time. Have incredible relationships that cautious people may miss - but at the same time - have incredible pain when you put your trust in untrustworthy people.

3. You can try and ascertain the trustworthiness of those you have relationships with - and merit out trust based on a discerning spirit. You will miss - you will get hurt - but there will be relationships that will be lifelong and rewarding.

Honestly - as a Pastor - I vacillate between all three at times. You love the people God has called you to serve - but there expectations are incredible and unrealistic at times.

There are so many people who think they can Coach the Texans ... so when the Coach passes on Young and Bush - the fans cry for their heads. The Coach based his decision on experience, wise counsel, where the team is headed, empirical evidence, and what is best for the team. It may or may not work out - but he is the leader - the coach - and he would give his right arm for victories. But everyone thinks they can do a better job - when in reality - they really don't have a clue of what it takes to Coach a team.

For those of you who go to church - love your Pastor. Support him until he gives you moral or scriptural reasons not to.

I promise you &#8230; we are not bullet proof and we do feel.

The constant shrieking of a few make you feel like it is everybody - when in fact - it is just a very small group with big loud voices.

Having said that &#8230; let me end this "whine" (grin) with a verse:

"This is the day the Lord has made - I will rejoice and be glad in it - for God is in total control - even though it doesn't always feel like it." Psalm 118:24 - Mark Redd Paraphrase


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## Mrs Backlasher (Dec 19, 2004)

Awesome. This is the "nuts and bolts" of spirituality.

We see how Jesus handled circumstances, then we know that we are to follow in his steps and be imitators of him. Not painless, by any means. But we learn first-hand that God's ways are best, and we become more Christ-like through these experiences.

Having learned at the feet of Jesus, we share these experiences with others. And they too learn of his ways and follow him. What could be better?

Praise the Lord for our ministries to each other! This is a place where we can share our joys and help carry each others' burdens.


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## Bucksnort (Jun 29, 2004)

Just to let you know Mark, We have been praying for you and our church over at our house. In fact we always pray for you and the church. I can only imagine how difficult a job it must be, being a pastor. We need to go do a lunch when you get a chance. You still owe me a burger.


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## Bubba T. (May 27, 2004)

*good word rev!*

i am one of those who love the lord also!


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## luv2fish (Mar 21, 2005)

Oh the Power of the Lord. I needed this reminder. I have been pardoned.Thank you Dear Lord, for helping me release harbored animosity. Hallelujah, Thine the Glory. AMEN



HE is a on time God.


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## harvey/mary (Apr 2, 2006)

Even being"burnt" by the closest of closeness in this life...I STILL continue to give the same people, as well as others, the "benefit of the doubt". I am a VERY forgiving person these days, yet...still cautious. Even though I do not consider myself as a "role model for Christians", people, including my wife, at times, think I am "crazy" for giving people many chances. My heavenly Father gives me the "benefit of the doubt" practically on a daily basis. Jesus Christ has forgiven me over....and over....and over. Think of it as God's Word tells us in a marraige, to look at it this way..."Husbands love your wives as Christ loves the church........" Hopw many times have we, His Bride, commited spiritual adultry. Our spouses before Christ...our jobs...our fishing....our "what evers"..and not ONCE has jesus EVER, nor will He ever, say, that is enough and walk out on us. How many times have we "quinched the Spirit" and He is SO faithful and just to forgive us.....and to cleanse us from ALL unrighteousness !!!!!!!!!!!! We can be disobedient to the point where He will bring us home early...but He will NEVER EVER walk out on us and "divorce" us. So, because of this.....70 x 7.....I give others chances.....not to say I am not cautious or careless...but because He has and does forgive me.....I will continue to forgive others...and at times...because of the Holy Spirit gently "nudge-ing" me...I will make the first move to say I am sorry...even if I am not the cause. To show Christ's love this way...is one of the BEST seeds we can plant. I am forever humbled at Christ's love for ME. How precious His love is. Thank you Father...for giving us your Son. I lift you up Father, for you are the Giver of ALL good things, and you are always in control with a purpose when you allow bad things to hit me. Thank you Jesus, for making the "Bridge" back to the Father through You....and thank you Holy Spirit for revealing Him to me...to us...and reminding us of all things that Jesus has said. Thank you God for Loving us beyond words. Jesus showed us with actions how much you love us. I thank you and praise you and glorify you, for You ALONE are the ONLY True, Living God, the God of Abraham, Issack and Jacob. Thank you.


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## activescrape (Jan 8, 2006)

That's pretty insightful Harvey/Mary. Thank you for that illustration. I guess I really never got it like that.


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## JDean (Jun 30, 2005)

I just went through a couple of years I may never forget. I won't go in to all the details because I don't feel that the "betrayal" is as important as the purpose or the outcome.

But God is faithful, he led me to a book in such a way that I had to read it, to say I'm thankful would be an understatement. It was one of those I could have written myself describing those couple of years.

It's titled Exquisite Agony written by Gene Edwards

Amazon Link

If you've ever felt betrayed, especially by brothers and sisters in Christ, this is a great tool in understanding the purpose.


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## bambinosan (Feb 9, 2005)

Thanks again Dr Redd, for this nice writing. I continue to go back to it each day for more. 

Encore!


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## psalty (May 31, 2004)

Thanks Mark. Right on the timing for me to read ,study, and absorb.


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## SurfRunner (May 22, 2004)

That is a great read Dr. Mark.

I believe God will always have people who will betray us in our lives. He wants us to come to a place of saying "Father, forgive them. For they know not what they do". God wants to make us like Jesus.

I have been betrayed several times and began to grow bitter about it. Then the Lord started showing me that I wasn't any better than they were.

GonnaMissR, I have read that book along with a couple of others by Gene Edwards. It is very good.


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