# Profound " On the Water" quotations from your fishing buddies.



## donf (Aug 8, 2005)

How about some gems of wisdom from you or your fishing buddies while out on the water 
I'll start.

Back to the boat after a long wade for nothing. Big Harry says well, I got two blowups. Stumpgrinder says "Those blowups and a dead hardhead might feed an alley cat" .

Steve is looking at a newbie's bloody thumb impaled by a huge treble hook . Newbie is in tears. Don says, "you can always trim off the hook and push the barb through", and Steve replies, " Yea, but pushing that barb through ain't no picnic either pal".


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## d4rdbuilder (Jan 19, 2007)

Offshore: "It's so still and flat out here... I swear, if you stare in one direction long enough, you could see the back of your own head!"

Running wide open across the lake (Rayburn) in my old boat when we passed a new bass boat working his way out of the timber. Heard him come on plane, went passed us like we weren't moving... buddy looks over at me and says "****, he'll have his fish cleaned before we get back!"


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## Hendu3270 (Oct 2, 2006)

"man......I gotta take a dump!"


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## Blue Water Ho (May 21, 2004)

Said to a liquid courage filled customer out 40 miles. " If you think you can take me, Lloyd and Capt. Fred on, well lets dance."


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## Blue Water Ho (May 21, 2004)

One more daid to a punk kid that pulled out a little pocket knife on me. "Man all youre gonna do is pisss me of with that thing." He put in his pocket, end of story.


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## tail-chaser (May 5, 2007)

Took my wife fishing for the first time. Her first fish, she hooks on to decent sized sheephead(we were on the south shoreline in west matty), almost gets it to the boat and I hear "holy moly thats a big bass". I chuckled, didnt correct her, and she is still tell the story about the day she outfished me and cut a largemouth bass. hehehe


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## cfred (Jun 13, 2004)

"Where's my pink thong?" (a joke about a potlicker deterrent device) coming from a guy you wouldn't want to see in any color thong!


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## Hop (May 21, 2004)

cfred said:


> "Where's my pink thong?" (a joke about a potlicker deterrent device) coming from a guy you wouldn't want to see in any color thong!


ROFL! you forgot to add "and my cape!"
--Hop


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## 1hunglower (Sep 2, 2004)

Mako Clay would always tell newbies 60 miles offshore "Out here in the deep blue theres a fine line between horesplay and foreplay" I don't know what he ment though.ha ha


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## coachlaw (Oct 26, 2005)

These fellows who used to come to our camp in La. all the time had an interesting regimen. They would arrive "Live and Direct" from the bar, which never closed, so it could be any time of day. Anyway, they'd keep drinking beer until any work was finished. Once it was time to lay down the hammers and do some fishing, someone would make the pronouncement. "Time to make the switch!" From beneath every center console would appear a jughandle of Jim Beam. The rest was never boring.

You'll occasionally hear of me arriving "Live and direct." But I never "Make the switch." Never located a taste for Beam.


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## Mrschasintail (Dec 8, 2004)

Hubby, 4 year old son(at the time) and myself, fishing at the Freeport Jetties. Tater has a fish on and as we watch him Hubby say, I better get the net, it could be a big ***** trout, fish comes up Tater say....and I quote..."It's a big ***** shark Daddy"!!


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## Motownfire (Jun 25, 2007)

Fishing with my buddie Justin under the toll bridge at SLP and a boat comes up casting right were we are. Some chick standing on the front deck wearing a bikini and really shouldn't be (with two guy's). So I yell to the chick, "hey you gonna report that hail damage on your A** to the insurance company???" They left shorty after that. Gotta love those pot lickers!!!


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## Fishaholic (Jan 9, 2005)

Wading the surf a friend of mine hooks a nice fish on topwater. It is ripping out line. Five minutes later he is walking back to the truck with these famous words. "Spooled me out..... BIG TROUT" I almost drowned i was laughing so hard.


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## Capt D (Jan 12, 2006)

*Dam*



Motownfire said:


> Fishing with my buddie Justin under the toll bridge at SLP and a boat comes up casting right were we are. Some chick standing on the front deck wearing a bikini and really shouldn't be (with two guy's). So I yell to the chick, "hey you gonna report that hail damage on your A** to the insurance company???" They left shorty after that. Gotta love those pot lickers!!!


 now thats funny


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## Motownfire (Jun 25, 2007)

Thanks Capt D I keep that saying in my "top 10 bag"............


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## bedicheck (Jan 9, 2006)

"i caught a friggin' sea turtle!"

that sucked.


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## LA Cox (Oct 19, 2004)

We were fishing a back lake off the S. Shoreline of W. Matty. I had a work buddy of mine with me that doesn't get to fish much. We finish the wade, and head back to the boat. He had a top water hanging from his left shirt pocket. When he went to jump up into the boat the topwater stuck through his left thumb. We tried pushing it through, before the newer technique with the fishing line was out, but couldn't get it to come out. His quote kills me..."Dude I can't afford to lose this one...it's the last one I've got!" He was referring to his thumb...lost the other one in a roping incident years ago! I about fell out of the boat!

Late,
Cox


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## jamesgreeson (Jan 31, 2006)

I had hooked up with a large jack fish that was killing me,i was beat.I just sat down on the rod hard it doubled over and broke the line at the reel,as it came out it wrapped around the end eye and snapped again.[I tell people i caught a fish so big he broke the line in two places]


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## Freshwaterman (May 21, 2004)

My Bro Jaime hooks a monster of trout one day while we are drifting in to set up a wade. I told him sucked for not waiting to fish til we started our wade but none the less it's a pig so congrats.

He dead pans back to me "Yeah, so big I gonna have to take her out the water in installment plans."


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## TEAMAFISHINADO (Oct 25, 2005)

*2nd Time Taking A Buddy Offshore*

And He Gets Sea Sick.

So I'll Tell Him Try Drinking A Big Red Or Grape Soda On The Way Down.

He Says Ok, Will It Keep Me From Getting Sick?

I Tell Him Nope! But It Is Much Prettier Coming Up.

T/a


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## Wading Mark (Apr 21, 2005)

A friend of mine once said,"How do I know when I have a tarpon on my rod?"

A different one also said,"Can those fish even see our lure?" This is after limiting out on one drift. 

Luckily, both use their head more with more experience.


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## Stumpgrinder (Feb 18, 2006)

At greens one day after swishing a 5 foot ray away with my rod tip, having a 10 lb red literally blast between my legs and staring a 6 foot bull shark eyeball to eyeball (all within 30 minutes of getting out of the boat) I screamed at a buddy in the boat " I've had enough of this wild kingdom s*&t, come get me out of the food chain"

Thats one day I was glad to leave them biting.


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## Richard (Aug 28, 2005)

A friend (new to fishing) and I are fishing for whites just below Choke Canyon. He gets a bite, sets the hook and immediately the fish starts pulling drag. **** near spools him so he throws down the rod and begins pulling in line by hand. Got so excited he comes close to slipping into the river when he finally pulls the fish out of the water.....6-7 inch male white bass. I ask him "What the heck do you have your drag set on?" Answer....."what's drag?"

Laughed so hard we had to pull out the Motrin.....

Richard


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## Richard (Aug 28, 2005)

Same friend was fishing Choke Canyon when we decide to tie up and eat lunch. I tied up the front of the boat on a tree and threw him another rope to toss over a branch on the back side. As I'm adjusting the tension on the front I hear this "SPLASH". I turn around just in time to see my new rope disappear under the water. (Seems like he threw both ends of the rope and forgot to hold on to one of them). I look at him with mouth open and questioning looks when he turns to me and says "Now where did you buy that rope?" 

Had a new rope on my desk first thing Monday morning !!

Richard


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## Freshwaterman (May 21, 2004)

At Clem's one afternoon cleaning some trout with about four or five guides cleaning or waiting too. Yankee walks up and comments on how beautiful our catches are._ He says...._
"Seen hundreds of um up tight to the shore this morning but they wouldn't take my fly. What type ya'll use?" To which Capt. Don says... We call um mullet and we use a cast net.


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## coachlaw (Oct 26, 2005)

My dad's graduate student's name was Paddi. He was a Pakistani fellow who had a certain way with the English language. On his first trip out on the bayou, we have 14 people on my dad's boat. They're all catching specks 2 at a time. I'm bent over unhooking this girl's last catch and Paddi taps my shoulder and says, "Sandy, I need a new stick." I stood up and said incredulously, "Paddi, what . . . . DID . . . . YOU . . . . Do with the one I gave you?" "Oh that?" he said, "I threw it in the water."

When my dad wants to go to the sporting goods store for tackle, he says, "I need a new stick."


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## tiderunner (Aug 3, 2005)

Me and my daughter (13 back then) were drift fishing and she says "dad there's a slick, I'll troll over to it." She gets us close and while she wasn't looking I chunked a natural colored topdog out and was working it back in. She say's "dad, its not trout. I don't smell the watermelon. Look at that crazy mullet, its swimming right toward the boat." I looked at her and said "thats my topwater". We both died laughing.


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## DMC (Apr 2, 2006)

I was fishing with a friend who was rather new to the saltwater fishing scene, and we were fishing a narrow pass for reds. I had a good hookup on a 30" red, fought it through a few runs and as the red was giving up, 10' from the boat, big guy (friend) leaning over the side of the boat with net in hand, a big bullshark appears out of nowhere, eyes all white and gills flared, and inhales the redfish. One snap of the head and the bull was gone as fast as it arrived, with nary a trace of the red. My line just snapped without bending the rod. The guy sits on the deck of the boat, net still in hand and says "dude, what just happened?" I say "we got robbed". He says "let me see you get out there with that castnet now, Bill Dance". I was wading around not 10 minutes earlier castnetting fingermullet.


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## bowed up (Apr 1, 2007)

"Hold my beer and watch this!!!"
the infament fish call: "Here fishy, fishy! Here fishy, fishy!"


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## pg542 (Oct 9, 2006)

Years ago fishing one the beachfront piers during the bullred run. Decked a decent one with no spots anywhere and people all around. Big red starts drumming and this one elderly fellow says " what is that a croaker?" People standing around saying "thats a redfish man". elderly gentleman says "that ain't no redfish, Got no spot on his tail". A little while later on my way to the little boys room, the elderly man elbows his fishing buddy and says 'thats that old boy that caught that giant croaker". I just smiled and kept on walking.


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## Redfishon (Nov 10, 2005)

""My brother throwing up"" My wife saying did you eat subway"" My brother"" I think thats an olive""


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## Castaway Rods (Aug 15, 2005)

Took my oldest son out for his 1st ever fishing trip when he was 4 years old or so. Just me and him on a nice calm cool November morning. Picked up some live shrimp at the dock, pulled out in front of the Causeway in Corpus Christi Bay and set the anchor. Bait up his line with a live shrimp and a popping cork.

I instruct him to tell me as soon as the cork goes under the water. As he sits there watching his cork as I had instructed him to, I turn around to set up my rod. The entire time that I am rigging my rod, he is saying "It's gone....... no it's not, it's gone......... no it's not, it's gone.......... no it's not" and so on and so on. You see each time a wave would come by the cork would simply dissappear to him for a split second. I thought it was down right funny.

Not a few minutes later I look up and the cork is really gone. I help him set the hook and let him reel in a 20" trout. As I am removing the hook, he tells me "Daddy, daddy, daddy.... That was fun, let's make the shrimp turn into a fish again daddy!"

I nearly fell out of the boat I was laughing so hard!


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## GSMAN (May 22, 2004)

We were coming around the jetties and I announce that we are going to fish the "20 mile" rigs. One of our passenger asks "how far are they?"


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## dolch (Aug 19, 2005)

My best friend and I took a couple girls fishing in E.Matty. One had never been before, so we were letting them chunk shrimp. We had spent some time earlier in the day explaining to watch for birds. 

Tracy belts out, "look at the birdies!"


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## stangfan93 (Aug 4, 2007)

One night a friend and I were out at night shark fishing and we have two lanterns on the back of the boat so we can see. After several hours of not catching anything we decided to call it a night. He flips open one of the live wells to store a few things in there and it causes the lantern to swan dive into the bay. We can still see it for about 3' until the water floods it and kills it. "Great, just great. Why did you do that Daniel?" Now just to remind you he "threw" the lantern into the water not me and I remind him of that also to which he replies "Well I can very well blame myself now can I?"

That is such a great line that I use it to this day. It works especially well on friends, Family, girlfriends and I am pretty sure wives. You can use it in any sitation where something is your fault. Say if the girlfriend and I are going somewhere and I get lost its her fault because I cant very well blame myself now can I?


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## goatchze (Aug 1, 2006)

stangfan93 said:


> "Well I can't very well blame myself now can I?"


That's awesome.

I like this one: "It's official! There are no fish in this bay."


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## LBS (Sep 2, 2004)

Long day of fishing with not much action, atleast 10 beers a piece in the heat of the summer and my cousin and I decide to net some bait and just anchor up and listen to the radio while we soak some cut mullet. We were kinda worn out and quiet and watching the sounder for the whole we were going to fish. A few fish start showing and my cousin mumbles in a very serious tone "Dude, there's some whoppers down there". That changed our tune and it ended up being a fun day.


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## snagltoothfrecklefish (Jul 27, 2004)

While fishing POC, we had half our group want to go out and fish at lunch while the other half stayed in the house waiting for the afternoon bite. We ran through fisherman's cut and while winding the back bay channel, I cut a corner and ran the boat hard aground into 6" water. We came to a grinding halt, the motor threw a great brown rooster and I shut off the motor. Immediately my buddy grabs a rod and says, "I guess we are wading here?". I looked around quickly, grabbed my rod and said, "Yes, this is the place."


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## biggreen (Feb 23, 2005)

Giving my uncle a hard time for keeping catfish barely big enough to get a filet off, I yell from my boat to his,"you gonna keep that little thing?" His response,"It'll make a turd".

I still use that one.
later, biggreen


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## donf (Aug 8, 2005)

Took a customer out in the winter for a wade trip, and I got in the water first and slid off about 50 yards. After he got his waders on, I heard this huge splash by the boat. He went in headfirst. By the time I got back, he was stripped down to his underwear. I said, "Man I did'nt know you had that kind of trip planned."


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## mastercylinder60 (Dec 18, 2005)

d4rdbuilder said:


> Offshore: "It's so still and flat out here... I swear, if you stare in one direction long enough, you could see the back of your own head!"


this one is my favorite, so far. that's a gem.


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## Third Wave (May 24, 2004)

Fishing at Braunig Lake one blistery summer afternoon...My cousin, uncle, and I are soaking some crawdads for redfish. My cousin and I are pulling in fish left and right, most of them over 28". My cousin has attached a brass bell to the end of his rod and the constant ringing is annoying his father to the point he's fuming. My cousin pulls in a another big red, removes the bell from his rod tip and jingles it in his dad's face. The old man snatched it away like he was on Kung Fu theater and tossed it as far as he could into the water. He said, "Where's your bell now Tinker?" My uncle still didn't catch any fish that day but he had a smile on his face the rest of the afternoon.


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## Shin-Diggin (Jun 17, 2005)

On rough water days when cutting across East Bay in a 14ft flat bottom. As we are getting beat to death I always like looking at who ever fishing with me and I say, Thats the reason I spent extra for the weld craft. I always start laughing so hard, it mostly ticks off my fishing buddys. 


On another trip with another flat bottom boat. Me and Al-uminun (sp) are on Lake Houston and its start pouring down rain. Hes on the front of the boat smoking looking back at me and tells me to open her up hes getting soaked. The bad thing was I was already wide open, that was all she had. I just kept laughing watching him he try to smoke that cig and keep that Blue Beast can high and dry. 

SD


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## twitch-twitch-reel (May 21, 2006)

Well, if your gunna be dumb. You gotta be tuff.


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## FishinTheBarge (May 21, 2004)

This is one we use, as a joke, on the boat all the time. Buddy use to keep everything legal he caught. Another buddy on the boat caught a 6 or 7" sandtrout and went to toss it back. First buddy says in a real low mean voice, "You throw that back, I'll punch you in the face". Guess you had to be there and know my 5' 6" buddy. 

Another favorite was, "is that bird standing up, OH *****"


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## Leemo (Nov 16, 2006)

In 1989 my wife and I rented a house in Marathon Key, all I had at the time was a 14' flat bottom that I bought at Kroll's, I wanted to do some diving, so we went out about 18 miles offshore on the Atlantic side to a platform, little choppy going out (no big deal I shrimped in Texas) about a 35' dive boat pulls up along side of us and shouts "there's a small craft advisery issued" I being from the proud state of Texas shout back " If I see any small craft out here, I'll let em' know!"..


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## Grogus (Jul 19, 2007)

Returning to the boat ramp after a day on the water my buddy decides that we don't need to pull up to the dock for him to get off. He looks at the depth finder and sees that we are in about 4' of water, so he decides to go to the front of the boat and get off, walk up the ram to get the truck. He slid off the front and proceded to go underwater with the boat going over the top of him. The boat is suddenly pushed to the side and he come up at the same spot he went in. Gasping for air he is stuck in the mud. After pulling him out of the mud and back onto the boat without his shoes he exclaims "Those stupid shoes were too heavy and pulled me under!"


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## Freshwaterman (May 21, 2004)

Going offshore one day with a couple of buddies, one which was scared to loose sight of land. We were about 5 miles out and he ask "how much further we got to go?" You should have seen the look on his face when I told him about another 30 miles!! We ended up having a great day and he lost his fear.


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## I_Just_Wanna_Fish (Aug 22, 2007)

Can you go around the waves please


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## biggreen (Feb 23, 2005)

30+ miles offshore, "can we drive over there? it looks smoother."

later, biggreen


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## Hotrod (Oct 11, 2006)

Hendu3270 said:


> "man......I gotta take a dump!"


LMAO. Thats me on every trip, for some reason the water triggers something.


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## Hotrod (Oct 11, 2006)

It's a ritual. Can remember my Dad saying it when I was a kid. First pee in the water and say " This will make em bite". Every trip.


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## WetAndSmelly (Jul 4, 2007)

Many years ago, my fishing buddy and I were quite a few miles offshore out of Freeport on a vendor's Hatteras. The wake-up beverage that morning, around 0330, was Laphroaig, followed by lots of beer and greasy snacks, and 5-to-8 seas. Midmorning he started chumming for mullet, as we call it. After a long bout of hanging over the gunwale, he stumbled back to a seat on a big cooler, pale as a ghost, wiped his chin, reached for another beer, and said "Bring me a wench!" in his best Falstaffian tone.


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## rf1970 (Jun 6, 2006)

Sitting on any given spot not catching fish, my friend has been known to say "I have a hundred spots just as good as this one."


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## fatrat82 (Feb 27, 2006)

well me and my buddies are big saltwater fisherman and duck and deer hunters. We are more or less your suburban ********. We're not ashamed of it but our wives are most of the time. Not to offend anyone on this site who's name is bill but being where we live in texas we see a lot of ******** who always seemed to be called bill. Its just one of the things we've noticed over the years. Well, we started calling each other "bill" all the time. Since we all dip tobacco, everytime we get out of the boat to start our wade or our duck hunt, one of us always says to the other in a texas twang, " Hey Bill, now don't you get to far away with that there can." Most of the time the twang sticks for the entire day or weekend and thats when the wives get really mad. lol


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## WetAndSmelly (Jul 4, 2007)

"This will make them bite" reminds me of many early mornings wading, usually SLP or Ft. Travis back when you could get into the water without breaking your fool neck. It was always a race to get to crotch depth in the chilly water. After warming the waters and moving a bit deeper, the next part of the morning ritual was invariably someone in the group to start "calling croakers". You fresh-water guys will know this as "calling bullfrogs".


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## PrisonerOnGalvetraz (Sep 12, 2006)

"Can you drift back over that spot, and I'll try and get'em with the net?"


Not having GPS at the time, my fishin' bud leaned over the side of my boat, and his keys dropped from his shirt pocket into West Bay. Just as his keys hit the water, I hollered,"Get the net!" His son handed him my bait net. That may have worked, but we were in 4 feet of water, and my bait net has about an 18" handle. It was a true Three Stooges moment.

POG


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## Aggieangler (May 28, 2004)

You are working your topwater on a morning wade and miss a huge blowup. Often you will hear "Ahoy Matey" from your buddy who is 25 yards away on the same shoreline as he casts over the spot you just missed her at. (We call that a fish pirate!)


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## Fish Killa (Aug 24, 2007)

That is classic stuff right there.



Aggieangler said:


> You are working your topwater on a morning wade and miss a huge blowup. Often you will hear "Ahoy Matey" from your buddy who is 25 yards away on the same shoreline as he casts over the spot you just missed her at. (We call that a fish pirate!)


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## rf1970 (Jun 6, 2006)

Sitting in a duck blind on a slow day, this always works. When one sees a flock of geese crusing by 200 yards up in a v-formation, one can always ask, "do you know why when they fly like that one side is larger than the other?" When someone responds that they dont know, tell him "because there are more geese on that side".


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## DMC (Apr 2, 2006)

Friend and I fishing near the ICW over some grass beds in about 6' of water. My friend says "dude, lets go fish that grass over there", pointing at some grass in 1" of water. I say "that grass is almost on dry land". He says "yeah, but there has to be fish where there's grass". I say "we are fishing in grass now..." He says "huh? No we aren't". I say "here" and hand him my polarized Costa Del Mar sunglasses. He says "holy ****, how long as that been there?" He bought a pair that day...


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## HoustonKid (Dec 29, 2005)

I took a friend fishing that was a fresh water guy from West Virgina. We were fishing the land cut at Port Mansfield and he hooked a Pompano.

It gets to the boat and he said 

"I don't know what I got, but it's one a them ocean fish."

I got a good laugh.


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## Brine Jake (Aug 12, 2005)

Wife's boss used to book his Trinity trips with Eastman. He invited me along one July day, only Eastman sent a substitute. After 2 hours boat riding from one spot to another, and no trout, we go back to the first spot, and fish about a half hour with no hits.
The guide says, "Man, y'all shoulda been here last November."

Two hours later, I have one little trout, the guide has 1 little trout, the boss, who is paying the tab, is skunked. I had not been optimistic about the trip, since it was mid-July, single tides with almost no movement all morning, and solunar periods bracketing our fishing time, roughly 7AM-noon.
I ask the guide, "Hey, do you ever pay any attention to tides and solunar tables, stuff like that?"
Guide replies, "Oh, they work, but I gotta fish every day any way."


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## boashna (May 28, 2004)

Took a friend fishing he said there is no fish at this spot . I said what makes you say that .reply was because there are no other boats in the area &#8230;



Took another guy fishing , he said let me park the trailer . I asked has he ever driven a trailer backward he said no - but he owns a pick up truck. 



Took another guy fishing he started telling me where to go to catch fish, I replied dentistry is your expertise and fishing is mine . 



I took another guy fishing and he started pointing the area we need to fish , I replied whenever you invest more than $1 in fishing equipment ,I will listen to him. Now tell me which rod , do you want to borrow. 



A jack hit my friends rod so hard that he thank me all day for grabbing him before he went overboard .



After taking a 100 picture of baby dolphin,I was asked if we can go swim with them .. I said what 



I took a friend with me because he knew boating and I did not . I refuse to pass a tug boat at night because I could see a green and red light inbound . I asked him does he know what the light meant .. he replied NO&#8230;&#8230; just pass the tug boat and don't worry about those light. Later on he discovered that they belong to another tug boat in icw heading in ..


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## donf (Aug 8, 2005)

Back of East Bay, 8 guys are lined up throwing deep, everybody has near limits on their stringers. Eastman and Friermood are in the line with their customers. Suddenly, a huge hole blows up in thw water next to Mickey, looked like somebody dropped a car in the water. 6 foot bull shark. Mickey flips his stringer off his belt like its another day at the office, and the stringer makes a beeline straight toward Blaine. Mickey says " Blaine, grab my stringer for me will ya bud" Blaine : F*** You !!! "


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## cfred (Jun 13, 2004)

No offense but I just noticed something. Why is every Bull shark seen in the bay 6ft. long? LOL. Never 4, never 5, always 6. Carry on......


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## Stumpgrinder (Feb 18, 2006)

Well Cfred, my particular bullshark appeared to be about 20 feet long when I was right there in his wheelhouse.

I shrunk him down to 6 for believability purposes.


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## cfred (Jun 13, 2004)

LOL, Yeah, I bet! Again, no offense intended, I just thought it was funny. I actually had a run in with one in Florida and guess what size I told everyone he was?


Stumpgrinder said:


> Well Cfred, my particular bullshark appeared to be about 20 feet long when I was right there in his wheelhouse.
> 
> I shrunk him down to 6 for believability purposes.


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## gotEMgot (Jun 16, 2007)

"Boo dee dee deet Boo dee dee deet..." Friend imitading a seagull.... All day looooong...


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## stangfan93 (Aug 4, 2007)

cfred said:


> No offense but I just noticed something. Why is every Bull shark seen in the bay 6ft. long? LOL. Never 4, never 5, always 6. Carry on......


Because they're FISH STORIES!!! My black tip shark I caught a while back seems to get a little bigger everytime I show people by using my hands.


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## Damo (Aug 24, 2005)

Me and a bud were cleaning some trout and a red on the Goose Island pier when a group of 6 or so elderly winter Texans gathered around. One lady asked me, "Oh, what kind of fish are those?" Specks and a Red I replied. 
Then a gentleman in the group corrected me and said that they were Spotted Seatrout, and more correctly they were Spotted Weakfish and the other was a Red Drum. So I say well actually those are Cynoscion Nebulosos and that one there is Sciaenops Ocellotus. He looked grumpy.
The woman then said "Oh, you nice boys must be from the UT Marine Science school in Port Aransas." No ma'am I replied.
"Oh well in that, case your just a smart *** with some specks and red"
Yes, ma'am, I replied, yes ma'am!!!

Damo


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## Hotrod (Oct 11, 2006)

gotEMgot said:


> "Boo dee dee deet Boo dee dee deet..." Friend imitading a seagull.... All day looooong...


LMAO. That sounds like something I'd do. Too funny.


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## daniel greak (Aug 16, 2005)

We had been wading POC all moring when we pulled up to south pass to check the tide and see what was happening there. I told my buddy to drop anchor I wanted sit here a while and see if anything was happening before we decided to wade or move on. I have my back turned to the back of the boat and I hear "I am fixing to catch me some ****** fish" and then a huge splash. He bailed from the boat right after asking what the depth finder said, and I answered with 9 and 1/2 feet. I turned around to see only a hat floating and then 2 arms coiming up though the water reaching for the boat. First thing he says is "Man it's deep here"


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## Levi (Mar 6, 2006)

I_Just_Wanna_Fish said:


> Can you go around the waves please


That was a female I am willing to bet???? I have been asked that buy my sister and her friends before..lol


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## Rustytrout (Jun 2, 2005)

Several years ago at Conroe with a buddy - fishing one Sat. afternoon in his ancient bathtub looking, mustard color, stick control bass boat. Fishing slows, so he decides we should go to Bannana Bay to check out the action. We pull up in between all the shiny expensive ski boats -- everyone is looking at us like it is a sin to show up in a boat like that -- three hotties come walking by and buddy says to them - "want a ride - she's faster than she looks!" I'm still laughing my arse off as all three jump in


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## Te.jas.on (Mar 28, 2005)

This happened just this weekend.

I was up in a shallow marsh off the ICW, debating whether or not, even with the high tide, I could get my boat up in this one particular lake.

My buddy says to me, "God doesn't love a coward."

That's him in the green shirt helping to push the boat out.


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## Freshwaterman (May 21, 2004)

My good buddy Tyler Thorsen can wake up a sleeping fishing boat quickly by a dead on screaming reel immatation that sounds just like a Penn 6/0 going off with a 100# wahoo on the end of the line. 

Zreeeeee!


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## DAVIDC (Jul 10, 2006)

As a kid when we would go into the gulf dad would make us put on our PFD's when we would protest he would say " you aint JESUS so put on a life jacket". I used it on my kids as well.


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## ksjpm02 (Aug 20, 2007)

Heading over the dunes at the 15mm on PINS, on route to yarborough pass, with a couple of buddies and my dad. When my friend in his dad's new S10 blazer decides that the nice gravel road isn't good enough for his 4x4 and sinks the truck in the marsh just off the road. Dad turns the truck around to pull him out. Spraying mud, shell, and sweet smelling water all over buddies truck when we realize he never rolled up the windows or sun-roof. My looks at me with a little smurk and says "*Some people live and learn and some people just LIVE!."*


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## austinag (Aug 13, 2004)

*Funny Quotes*

Took my hunting buddies fishing couple years ago in POC. After our first wade back at the boat, I ask one buddy if he'd like someting to eat out of the ice chest. He bends down and grabs a Bud Light and says, *"There's a ham and cheese sandwich in each one of these".*

We still use that line today.


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## haparks (Apr 12, 2006)

lets fish till our arms fall off


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## plastics man (Jun 23, 2004)

Me and some friends are down at the bay house one night fishing off the dock, the wind was blowing pretty good and his wife has a zebco reel, she says"my hole is whistling" he says" well honey close your legs", I about feel in.


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## reelthreat (Jul 11, 2006)

The last trip I took to LA I cut myself pretty good... As we pulled up to the dock an guy said "you o.k.?" and my buddy replies "It's o.k. we're for Texas." the replies "oh, I see" and walks off. I about died laughing from the guys response.


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## Pittstop (Jun 20, 2007)

Fishing the Texas FishJam this weekend - Chunkin' Topwaters all morning. I got in the
boat for a quick break and a snack. One of my fishing team partners said "Looks like
you're about to BlowUp on that Snickers"


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## just yakin (Feb 10, 2007)

a buddy once said....man what a nice trip, we had to get our limit of bumps!! Maybe next time we will catch something.


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## TrueblueTexican (Aug 29, 2005)

*Old coastie at fishin center*

Years ago at POC there was this gentleman that sat watching the boats roll in -- we had a particularly good day offshore and I was pumped -- Guy asks "howd we do '' I said - "man we had a great day out 50 miles" to which he harrumphed "Son you had a good day any day ya go off that far and get back"

nuff said


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## pg542 (Oct 9, 2006)

My hole is whistling............I don't care who you are, that's funny right there.


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## Mullet Smasher (Apr 4, 2005)

*Some of My Favorites*

While stuck on a sandbar, three of us are pushing as hard as we can towards deeper water, in the middle of exerting ourselves my friend says " Don't stop till the whistle blows!"

Another one,
After his seventh hot pocket on the way in from the deep, my brother says," don't you know that eating and sleeping on a boat don't count."

Another one
Tied up to a rig leg, fishing for snaps, my late Grandad is chunking over the side green as a pea. After 30 mins of hacking he says" I'll be alright in a minute, just have to get the rest of this stuff up."

One that sticks out in my head: After a huge battle for a giant 600# bluefin, the fish is boatside on the wire, Captain screams from the bridge in a deep gravelly voice " HARPOON the MUTHA ******" Made me think of Capt. Ahab.


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## POCLANCE (Apr 5, 2006)

*Still alive*

After my 6 year old lost the first rod and reel in the water I bought when I was a kid, just after I had the reel referbished, he got an *** chewing.

Later we got into the trout and he said, "I want to fish."

I said, "you could but you lost my rod and reel."

He said, "at least I'm still alive."


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## Captain Greg (Jul 19, 2007)

A few years back, my son was out fishing with Myself and Bayoubum. He was 4 and hadn't got the hang of artificials yet. We were fishing live shrimp under a cork. Me and Bayou Bum were hooked up - when my son made the announcement "My cork's broke - IT AIN'T GOING UNDER!!" We both about fell out of the boat laughing!!!


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## bowed up (Apr 1, 2007)

BUDDY HAD A 22' MOWDY. WE LEFT OUT BEFORE SUNRISE ONE MORN AND CAME OUT OF THE DITCH TO TURN OUT IN THE BAY WHEN THE BOAT DECIDED TO SWAP ENDS. ANOTHER BUDDY HAD ALREADY POPPED A TOP BEFORE WE LEFT THE DOCK. HE GOES FLYIN OUT THE SIDE INTO WAIST DEEP WATER, COMES HOLDING THE BEER IN ONE HAND AND EXCLAIMS _"DONT WORRY I SAVED IT!!!"_


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## Aggiedan (Feb 7, 2005)

*From my 11 year old*

Watching some bottlenose getting after it;

"Hey Dad. What are those dolphins doing?"


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## Third Wave (May 24, 2004)

My Uncle-why is it always an uncle?...anyways...He's relieving himself off the side of the boat and says..."Whooo this water's cold...and Deep Too! Nice sandy bottom."


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## chicapesca (Jun 7, 2004)

Third Wave said:


> My Uncle-why is it always an uncle?...anyways...He's relieving himself off the side of the boat and says..."Whooo this water's cold...and Deep Too! Nice sandy bottom."


Now I don't believe Mark would say something like that.  I think you came up with it!!


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## Main Frame 8 (Mar 16, 2007)

GSMAN said:


> We were coming around the jetties and I announce that we are going to fish the "20 mile" rigs. One of our passenger asks "how far are they?"


HERE'S YOUR SIGN!


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## justin-credible1982 (Sep 12, 2006)

while fishing at the pass with a buddy he claims, oh big fish, big fish. I don't think it's a trout...It might be a hardhead.


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## Rick miller (Feb 20, 2007)

My son , close friend & myself where down at Isabel several years ago on day 5 of a week long trip . My friend and I were going to our beds at 7:30pm , sun not down for another hour or so . Son comes in and asked " Do you want me to pull the sun down for ya'll"


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## bogan (Mar 23, 2006)

Riding the bolivar ferry back from fishing east bay, and my sister asks me "what if the ferry sinks?". I tell her "No biggie, we are towing a boat and the truck is insured"


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## Shin-Diggin (Jun 17, 2005)

That chick just took her top off. 

Hang around the San Jac river enough and you will hear that saying alot. lol 

SD


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## Fishinpayne (Aug 15, 2005)

How come every fish lost " was a keeper right there."

Buddies favorite sayin " the boats loaded and the icechest is full of beer I am gonna catch something today for sure a fish or a buzz and the buzz is looking good."

After eating corn the evening before my buddie is sitting in the duck blind jumps up and goes and does his business, he comes back and says " do you think the game warder will consider it hunting a baited hole ?" as he points to some floating corn.

buddies girl friend is fishing with us and this is her first time fishing with a popping cork and artificials, she asks " what do I do when the cork goes down, is it the same as fishing with shrimp?" she says as the cork is hammered and going down all I could do was laugh, she was miffed at me.


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## Pescados Locos Tony (Feb 6, 2007)

I got a couple





1. "OK, this is bad idea number 647"- Chris M.

2. when staring in the face of sure defeat "sumthin good will happen" is always good- Adam K.



Tony


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## bayhawker (Nov 10, 2006)

*One Eyed*

Fishing in the river for a few cats when the big one hit. After .5 hours and getting this catfish boatside, I thought I had a one-eyed catfish. Until I looked on the other side of the boat and saw his other eye!

As the fishing guide reported to me when we met at the dock at 5:00am, "you shoulda been here yesterday, we did not catch many but they sure were small!"

My two cents to this thread- Have a good day!


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## gatorbait (May 21, 2004)

*cool thread*

Fishing with my FIL in the marsh in east bay. I had just caught a trout and stood up to cast again. When I did I hadnt dried my hands off very well and I cast the rod and reel right out into the water. I was in the water in no time retrieving it. My FIL looked at me and said, "They usually just want the lure" lol

Fishing with wishin4fishin a few weeks ago he had 7 specks in the boat and I had caught none. Fishing same thing casting in the same place, strangest thing I ever saw. I told him, "if you catch one more your sitting down for a while. lol After he caught another one I told him, "My tip better be going up!" lol

Z


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## TrueblueTexican (Aug 29, 2005)

*Kerplunk*

When my son was four years old (24 years ago) we were headin outta Pass Cavallo on a pretty snotty day in a Dargel - Bud was at helm, and we were pushin 4 footers to get outside, kid was standin by me and I had hold on him , but I hadn't put a life jacket on him, we hit a pretty good roller he went airborne and out the back with me rollin out the back almost immediately to get him -- all I could see was his upturned face as he sunk like a rock -- We were in about 20' and I actually rebounded off the sandy bottom when I caught up with him, we popped back up and I was treading -- my partner intent on pickin the best roller to get out was already 50 yards gone -- I yelled at top of my lungs and he did a double take to realize we weren't aboard anymore - came around and we climbed on board dried off the kid and put his jacket on--

He sat quietly in the boat as we went on to an old shrimper down the island to fish --

Got stopped and he said " Daddy did you see any sharks when you were coming to get me?"

Bust a gut not only thru relief we didn't drown, but that he would ask that question.

My bud still calls Bryan Kerplunk to this day

Bryan is now an AF Tech Sgt 13 FS Blackcats in Misawa Japan.


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## Jared (Jun 18, 2007)

A friend and I were fishing East Matagorda a few years ago in August it was about noon and the fishing was slow. We were drifting some deeper water around halfmoon reef and after about 45 minutes without any fish he stole a line from Robert Earl Keen. He looked right at me and sings "The drift goes on forever and the fishing never ends" By the end of the day we had the whole song worked out.


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## Lagunar boy aka Josh (Mar 8, 2007)

We were going into east bay through the cut with a irrigation guy..."so this is how you get to the ocean"


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## Tombo (Mar 15, 2005)

Heard a charter captain out of Panama City Beach, He jerked so hard on the hit, all he came up with was a pair of lips.


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