# What is the dumbest/craziest, etc. that you have done while intoxicated?



## carryyourbooks (Feb 13, 2009)

the reason i ask, is that after enjoying the festivities offered by the HLSR cookoff as we do annually, a couple members of my family had a not-so-memorable experience.

this past weekend, one of my beloved family members vomited all over his wife. the other was much worse. this family member fractured her shoulder in 2 places, cracked a rib, and punctured her lip with her tooth (only fell once).

i, on the other hand, have quit going to that happy place. many years ago, i decided it was time to stop before i got into legal trouble. just a few drinks and i'm good.

anyone else?:cheers:


----------



## Walkin' Jack (May 20, 2004)

While I was in the service in S. California I drank most of a bottle of mescal (That's the stuff with the worm in the bottle) I had brought back from Mexico and that night drove from San Diego to Oceanside California, a distance of 35 miles on the wrong side of the highway...and didn't figure it out until 3 days later.

Just about a dumb was the time when I was stationed on Okinawa got a weekend pass and checked into a resort for enlisted men and got drunk on sloe gin, which I DO NOT recommend. When I woke up the guys I was with were gone and I figured they just got so drunk they just went back on base early. See, I thought it was Sunday. I ate a big meal and decided to go on back as well. I walked into the clinic where I worked un showered, un shaved and in dirty civilian clothes The waiting room was full of patients and I was confused. The old man stuck his head out of the office and crooked his finger at me. I'll spare you the gory details but as it turned out it was MONDAY and I was AWOL!

Of course This one take the funniest prize.
ADVENTURES AT THE BAR FIRST CHANCE
or
The dangers of letting your mouth write checks 
That your butt can't cash

In January of '64 I was stationed on Okinawa and I was
selected to be part of a medical team to go to a
marine camp at the base of Mt. Fuji, Japan, as Medical
support for part of the 3rd Marine
Division. I don't know who's idea it was to use this
sight for this purpose but it was a good choice. We
could rarely see the top of the mountain for the
cloudy skies. The temperature would hover just above
the freezing mark then it would snow. Then it would
rain for a day or so, turning all the snow into a
muddy slop. Then the temperature would plummet to the
single digits and we'd spend the next few days
walking/sliding around on frozen mud. Then it would
snow like hell for a few days and begin the cycle all
over again. Can y'all spell MISERABLE?!?

The camp itself was a sordid little set up. Very
primitive, very spartan. I don't guess I expected much
in the way of amenities or creature comforts...after
all the point of this whole exercise was foul weather
training. I suppose I'm a poor candidate for cold
weather service, having grown up on the warm Texas
Gulf Coast, I just couldn't seem to learn to
appreciate taking a cold water shower, standing on a
pallet in the mud with a couple of feeble streams of
freezing water on me when the air around me was below
freezing. They shoulda called it "pneumonia training"

Everything was tents. I lived in a tent that was lined
with parachute silk with an oil burning stove right in
the center. The floor was pallets laid right on the
dirt. There was about one foot area around the stove
to have your cot in a good warming zone. 6 inches to
close and your apt to wake up with your hair and your
sleeping bag on fire, 6 inches to far away and you
could expect to wake up with ice cycles on you and
your lips and eyes frozen shut. 

One tent served as a sort of enlisted mens club. One
night a guy had his guitar out and he was singing and
playing some mellow tunes and I had a bottle of White
Horse Scotch. I sat around the stove drinking and
singing along and having a very fine evening. Before I
knew it I was snot slingin', knee walkin' drunk. I
walked outside and the cold hit me in the face like a
Mike Tyson punch. There was nearly 2 feet of snow on
the ground and when I got back to my tent the remains
of my dinner and all that scotch came back up and I
melted a 2 foot crater in the snow, all the way to the
ground. To this day I can't even tolerate the smell of
scotch.

There was a little town just a short ways up the road
from the camp. The name of it was Gotemba. It was
little more than a collection of bars with an
occasional noodle house or store of some kind. As you
come into the town the first thing you come to was a
bar, on the right side of the road and it was called
the Bar First Chance. On the same side of the road a
"benjo ditch" or sewer ran along parallel to the road.
It was unusual in that it was banked with concrete,
they are usually just dirt. It was about 8 feet deep
and at it's bottom ran a small, constant stream of RAW
sewage. 

There was a narrow foot bridge over the benjo ditch
and a path to the door of the Bar First Chance. On
either side of the bridge there was half a wagon wheel
which served as a hand/safety rail.

This was my favorite hang out for the obvious reason
that it was the "first chance" to park my butt on a
bar stool and tank up. The, ahhh, uhhh, errr,
"hostesses" were friendly and the marines were quite a
good group of guys. Sometimes it would get a little
rough but there was never any malice or hard feelings.
Just a bunch of good guys, tired from a hard day of
training how to kill and maim, blowing off a little
steam. 

On this particular occasion, it had been raining and
as a result the benjo ditch was running a little
deeper than usual, about 1 1/2' if I remember
correctly. We had a midnight curfew and it was getting
close to that time so I started heading out. We had
been having a rousing time and spirits were high. On
the foot bridge, I stopped and leaned my butt against
one of the half wagon wheels and as a small group of
marines passed I issued forth the challenge, "I bet
there ain't one of you grunts big enough to
knock....". That was as far as I got. I don't remember
going over the wheel but the next thing I new I was
sitting in the very bottom of the benjo ditch. I was
so plastered that I was unaware of any bumps or
bruises or that I was sitting in a river of, well, no
need to be too graphic here I suppose. I remember
thinking how funny it seemed at the time. The guys
were all looking down at me and laughing up a storm. I
was laughing right along with them. 

Eventually they left and I was left with task of
getting out of the benjo ditch and getting back on the
base before midnight. To my shock and disappointment,
I discover that the grade was too steep and I was too
drunk and to wet and slippery to to get out. The
expression "in a world of $#!%" comes to mind. I
suppose that I went to sleep or passed out shortly
after that because I don't remember anything else till
about 7:30 the next morning.

I was sitting with my eyes open, trying to recall just
how it came to be that I was sitting in a river of
sewage freezing nearly to death when I was aware of
the sound of children laughing and giggling. I looked
up to see a small group of kids, in their school
uniforms, on their way to school who had just paused
briefly to laugh at the "stinko" GI. By this time I
was sober enough to be aware of the reality of my
situation and it didn't seem so funny at that point. I
started trying to get out of the benjo ditch and about
that time a jeep with a couple of MPs pulled up and
read me the riot act. Fortunately for me the Sargent
was a guy that I had given penicillin shots to, on the
QT, for treatment of a social disease so he was happy
to cut me some slack. They got me back on the base and
let me go with a warning NOT to repeat that behavior
again. Believe me when I tell ya that I had absolutely
NO intentions of doing so.

It was quite some time before I could see all the
humor in that deal. The guy that knocked me off the
bridge felt bad about leaving me there but a few beers
later we were the best of pals again. I learned not to
go around letting my alligator mouth overload my
hummin' bird ***, too...a valuable lesson.


----------



## rockyraider (Feb 1, 2006)

I've certainly had more than my fair share of spirit induced moments of stupidity, but the older I get, the more I've learned that waking up to regret and embarassment isn't something that I enjoy. I still enjoy drinking and having a good time, but I try to do it more responsibly these days. Luckily, I've never done anything really dumb and I have always stayed away from drinking and driving. I'm gonna refrain from divulging too many details. I can tell you that in my job, I have seen many, many people do some really stupid stuff after drinking too much.


----------



## SolarScreenGuy (Aug 15, 2005)

I believe the dumbest thing I ever did was to go to the policia station in Boys Town Nuevo Laredo to complain about how I had been ripped off by one of the senoritas at the Diamente Azul. This was somewhere around 1972 and I was convinced that as an American, I would receive a refund for services not received. El Capitan at the station listened to my side of the story in english and of course her side in spanish. He immediately looked at me and said "Senor, you must go to jail". Away I went and shipped to the downtown Nuevo Laredo jail house for about 18 hours. Talk about a nightmare. Magically, my fine was exactly all the money I had except for 50 cents which was the toll amount to walk back over the bridge into Laredo. 40 years later, whenever my buddy who was with me on the trip get together, we still laugh about that one. As you can imagine, there is more to the story, however, to reveal the entire saga of events might damage my reputation amongst all of you upstanding citizens on this board.
I'm afraid I'll never forget that one, no matter how hard I try. But on the other hand, it's good to have wholesome life event stories to pass on to your children, grandchildren, nieces, and nephews isn't it?


----------



## marshhunter (Mar 20, 2008)

for some reason i cant seem to remember.... i always find out what i did the next morning..


----------



## Hotrod (Oct 11, 2006)

Ive done some crazy stuff Id rather not say, lol. 

Heres a girl I rolled up on at 2am on 59. Passed out on the shoulder, hung in her seat belt, and in her own vomit. Car running, I look inside and didnt see anyone else. When the cops showed up they open the passenger side door to find another girl passed out in her vomit, and there was vomit all over the dash and seats. These were very good looking young women when I saw them the next day. It coulda been dangerous for them if the wrong person stopped by on them. They had their purses and other valuables in the car.


----------



## Timalgrath (Jun 21, 2011)

Wade fishing on a shell reef near the inter coastal. 

Also when i was younger alot of stuff id rather not say.


----------



## Blk Jck 224 (Oct 16, 2009)

HUH? :cheers: :biggrin:


----------



## Sounding_7th (Dec 20, 2011)

Hotrod said:


> Ive done some crazy stuff Id rather not say, lol.
> 
> Heres a girl I rolled up on at 2am on 59. Passed out on the shoulder, hung in her seat belt, and in her own vomit. Car running, I look inside and didnt see anyone else. When the cops showed up they open the passenger side door to find another girl passed out in her vomit, and there was vomit all over the dash and seats. These were very good looking young women when I saw them the next day. It coulda been dangerous for them if the wrong person stopped by on them. They had their purses and other valuables in the car.


I remember my first beer lol:cheers:


----------



## DIHLON (Nov 15, 2009)

I could write a novel on the basis of this thread.


----------



## El Carnicero (Aug 27, 2009)

I dropped an epic size duece in one of my buddys cat boxes.


----------



## CaptainJMB (Nov 28, 2008)

I got married. 

Seriously.


----------



## Hooked Up (May 23, 2004)

CaptainJMB said:


> I got married.
> 
> Seriously.


You too? / Me too!


----------



## jamisjockey (Jul 30, 2009)

Jumping naked over a bonfire. Followed later by chasing illegals through the desert, naked, with a pistol and a machette. I've gotten pretty messed up a few times in my life, but I've never been able to top my going away party from MCAS Yuma.


----------



## DANO (May 23, 2005)

I plead the 5th,.............

on everything.


----------



## Dgeddings (Sep 16, 2010)

I just want to go on record saying this should be nominated for thread of the year for 2012 already lol

and I'm pleading the 5th also


----------



## jewfish (Feb 16, 2005)

*one more*



jamisjockey said:


> Jumping naked over a bonfire. Followed later by chasing illegals through the desert, naked, with a pistol and a machette. I've gotten pretty messed up a few times in my life, but I've never been able to top my going away party from MCAS Yuma.


 How bout the time you were a "wedding crasher"

( although I know you were probably sober........... gotcha again!!!!


----------



## Poon Chaser (Aug 22, 2006)

After boot camp I went to "a" school near Memphis. We got all likkered up one night and wated to see and concert at this venue call Mud Island. This is locate out in the Mississippi river and can only be accessed by bridge if you have a ticket. 

We didnt have tickets so decided to swim over to the show with our close in Trash Bags... 3 out of 5 of made it accros. the other 2 ended up 2 miles down river. We really didnt know how strong that current was and are all lucky to have lived.


----------



## lordbater (May 21, 2004)

I dunno, I just woke up, I'll check in later..

a


----------



## Mad Mike (Dec 28, 2005)

Jumped a water skii ramp on a kneeboard going about 50mph.


----------



## seeing reds (May 17, 2005)

*What is the dumbest/craziest, etc. that you have done while intoxicated*

"What is the dumbest/craziest, etc. that you have done while intoxicated"

2 Words: FAT GIRLS


----------



## chazbo (Sep 7, 2006)

jamisjockey said:


> Jumping naked over a bonfire. Followed later by chasing illegals through the desert, naked, with a pistol and a machette. I've gotten pretty messed up a few times in my life, but I've never been able to top my going away party from MCAS Yuma.


.....I got many many stories from MCAS Yuma..


----------



## Tortuga (May 21, 2004)

Well, I ain't gonna embarras myself..and disillusion folks that think well of me..BUT.. did have one almost identical incident as Old Salty involving a night in the Nuevo Laredo jail...but they didn't even leave us the 50 cents to get back across the border...

Ol' John Barleycorn has led me into some situations over the years that put that one in the shade though...but they shall remain confidential.. 

Moral to the post...Nothing good comes out of a bottle.. I just thank God or whoever that my brain finally kicked in about my 45th birthday..and I ain't touched a drop since then....


----------



## CORNHUSKER (Jul 12, 2004)

Never touch the stuff, screws up your personality.


----------



## Mountaineer Mark (Jul 15, 2009)

1st cookoff 2010............


----------



## Blk Jck 224 (Oct 16, 2009)

Mountaineer Mark said:


> 1st cookoff 2010
> 
> LOL...I slept in my truck that Friday night :cheers:


----------



## capt. david (Dec 29, 2004)

driving home!!! got stories but this is a g-rated site.


----------



## Bayscout22 (Aug 9, 2007)

Like most folks, I could write a book...

One that comes to mind, back when I was in the Air Force in San Antonio, four of us decided that we'd drive to Dallas for a Cowboys game. The two more responsible guys left the night before and we had plans to meet up in the seats we had already purchased. The two less responsible guys stayed in SA and partied Saturday night. We left SA for Dallas early for a late afternoon game. All I can say is we drank the whole time (this was the 80s) and probably still had a good buzz from the night before.

When we arrived at the stadium we were blitzed and continued the festivities in the parking lot. We are approached by a scalper to buy tickets and he offered to take our two and give us much better seats for a few bucks. We thought pretty well of our selves so we did it twice more - each time upgrading our seats.

When we got to our final destination - we were shocked to find our buddies weren't there. We spend the whole game on the look out and cuzzing them for not showing up. We cussed them all they way home after the game. We cussed them the next day when they showed up for work. After they let us know someone was in our seats for the game, the story came together.

I have no idea who won the game that day.


----------



## swifty (May 13, 2005)

Had a fer sure thing after a long night of dancing back in college. Good gosh she was hot and blonde and built just right.  Long story short took a leak before we left the bar while her and her girlfriend went to get the car. While in the restroom I ****** all down my leg, yes you read that right - heh, I thought I was aiming at the right spot but started to wonder why my leg started to feel warm. :spineyes: Went out to get in the car but it just wasn't meant to be that night. Most embarrassed I've ever been.


----------



## trodery (Sep 13, 2006)

Yeah.... You bunch of drunken fools.... I don't drink! <snicker>


----------



## 24Buds (Dec 5, 2008)

trodery said:


> Yeah.... You bunch of drunken fools.... I don't drink! <snicker>


 didn't you fall in my camp site?


----------



## sotexhookset (Jun 4, 2011)

About 50 or so of dem big (but always cute) or not so cute (but always a smokin body) girls way back when. No hate here and my post is worthy W/OUT pics. Or video. Or film. Thank God.


----------



## Bull Red (Mar 17, 2010)

When I drink too much I don't remember chit. Although I have heard some wild stories from my friends.


----------



## gray gost (Jul 8, 2010)

remember looking for a warm place to sleep it off because I could not get keys to open truck door. woke up in dumpster.


----------



## KJON (May 1, 2006)

Hurled in Dwight Yoakums bus, at which time his bodyguards hurled me outhwell:
Branded my brother with a "B" steak branding iron on the buttocks, yep, he dropped em and dared mehwell:
I could go on and on, don't believe that "with age comes wisdon" crappola


----------



## jamisjockey (Jul 30, 2009)

jewfish said:


> How bout the time you were a "wedding crasher"
> 
> ( although I know you were probably sober........... gotcha again!!!!


Crashed a bachelor party once and the stripper left because of me....that's a story that I can't retell on 2cool and without at least 3 or 4 beers in me.



> "**** chaser"After boot camp I went to "a" school near Memphis. We got all likkered up one night and wated to see and concert at this venue call Mud Island. This is locate out in the Mississippi river and can only be accessed by bridge if you have a ticket.
> 
> We didnt have tickets so decided to swim over to the show with our close in Trash Bags... 3 out of 5 of made it accros. the other 2 ended up 2 miles down river. We really didnt know how strong that current was and are all lucky to have lived.


No chit? My A school was in millington, too. We used to go get liqquored up at Mongo's and party all over Beale St. Saw James brown on Mud Island, met some hot chicks with my buddy.


----------



## jamisjockey (Jul 30, 2009)

chazbo said:


> .....I got many many stories from MCAS Yuma..


I was there before the border war blew up. Man we used to hit Messico and party like coked up rockstars.:cheers:


----------



## txgoddess (Sep 21, 2007)

I can count on one hand the number of times I've been drunk enough to do something stupid. I've been at a private residence every time and the stupidest thing I ever did was the chicken dance. I prefer to watch other people act like idiots. It hurts less in the morning.


----------



## txgoddess (Sep 21, 2007)

trodery said:


> Yeah.... You bunch of drunken fools.... I don't drink! <snicker>





24Buds said:


> didn't you fall in my camp site?


And fall at the BBQ a couple of years ago...

And have a 4 wheel drive ******* contest...

And wake up in his own garage...


----------



## 24Buds (Dec 5, 2008)

txgoddess said:


> And fall at the BBQ a couple of years ago...
> 
> And have a 4 wheel drive ******* contest...
> 
> And wake up in his own garage...


 Yep, I think this is the guy who fell in our camp into the smoker. Something about his ribs hurting the next day.....Yeah I remember that.

As for my stories, not sure I am ready to share them. Lots of them. :headknock


----------



## trodery (Sep 13, 2006)

24Buds said:


> didn't you fall in my camp site?


I was perfectly sober sir! I do believe you pushed me!


----------



## 24Buds (Dec 5, 2008)

trodery said:


> I was perfectly sober sir! I do believe you pushed me!


 sorry about that. I shouldn't have pushed you and I should provide better lighting. I am sorry.


----------



## Hooked Up (May 23, 2004)

Wasn't me , BUT, I seem to remember a very old post on 2cool about "webmaster tipping" . Still LMAO about that one.


----------



## rideorfish (Sep 13, 2009)

*A Cutie,the Balenese,+ a bunch of alochol*

:brew: In the late '70s, my buddy and I were bar hopping in Galveston, and met 4 girls from [Oklahoma,I think]. We all got blitz-krieged,and wound up back at their room at the Galvez Hotel. My buddy left me with a bunch more beer,and 3 of the girls were ready to crash. BUT, one was a trooper, and wanted to keep drinking! Off we go to the old seawall,[it was o-k to drink up there back then],and after a lot more beer, we decided to skinny dip ! We hid the beer ,and our clothes ,under the Balenese, and had a hay-ho time! In our mid 20s,you can guess how many times we were in and out of the water,and soft beach sand! So we woke up about 7a.m., with salt and sand dried all over us, and heads pounding,and sick as he!!, but we were still alive.[I bet that couldn't happen now!] Nobody mugged us, but her purse,and my wallet and shirt were missing! We were talking about what we lost, while we could barely walk up those steps up the seawall---Being that drunk, we didn't feel the pain the sand was inflicting in delicate places. When we reached the top of the stairs, one of us remembered, that we had hidden our stuff under a granite rock! After much searching,[like a noodler,I guess] we found them. In hindsight, there wasn't much money,no credit cards, or cell phones to lose, but it was great to find them! I walked her back to the Galvez, then had to walk 3 miles to my friends house,with that hangover! Being a B.O.I. poorboy,I never could afford to go IN the Balenese, but I'll always have a one-of-a-kind memory of it, since Ike took it away!


----------



## Johnboat (Jun 7, 2004)

*I wrote a hate letter*

With the help of a drinking buddy, I wrote and mailed a profane letter (long before email) to a recently broke up ex high school girlfriend. She lived at home then and her mother intercepted it, read it but did not tell her about it. (I am pretty sure the envelope gave away that it was written while intoxicated.) Years later her mother showed it to her and she called me. I think I was a college senior then...and engaged to another lady. I profusely apologized, admitted immaturity and idiocy, not ready for our relationship, etc. I think she accepted the apology, but who knows. She was a very nice, good looking girl who I really liked during our time together. She certainly didnt deserve my stupid letter. It was a horrible thing to do and I still get chills thinking I actually did that.


----------



## rideorfish (Sep 13, 2009)

*Correction!*

:cheers: Sorry, I should have spelled it: Balinese, but I'm sure everyone knows what I meant, thanks to ZZ Top !-----LOL:texasflag


----------



## Ragecajun (Oct 31, 2011)

*Tons of Stories*

In our group me and my wife are the "responsible ones" so we usually make sure everyone gets home safely. (Must be why I chose my line of work)...

Well at work many of things, but I'll share this one from two weeks ago.

(it was cold and stormy two Saturdays ago) We get a call from a 75 year old Grandmother, her front door handle began jiggling around 7:30 AM and she was expecting a family member from out of town. She opens the door and a tall attractive blonde co-ed walked into her apartment, pulled off her dress, grabbed a blanket and laid on her couch.

The grandmother told her to get out of her apartment, and her response was "F*&^ You, I'm going to sleep!"

After several failed attempts of talking, shaking, yelling at her, I woke her up by dragging her off the couch after her response to me was "F&*& you *****." (Mind you I'm White and Native American is about as dark as my heritage gets as far as I know.)

She yelled and cursed repeatedly and told me that she was in her sister's apartment. After several polite remarks hinting to drag her thru the flooded parking lot in the cold weather and in her current clothing, (Bra, and Boy Shorts), she calmed down. She was unable to provide an apartment number for her sister and did not live anywhere close, so she spent a day in the "city motel" :cop::cop::cop:

(One of the first times in 12 years that I saw a partially clothed ATTRACTIVE female in this job...The ones we see usually are hideous.)

Several others from my buddies but the readers digest story goes something like this: It involved plenty of alcohol, a Honda Z50R, and a stop sign at the edge of a ditch. It ended with a trip to the ER and multiple staples to close his large head wound...:headknock


----------



## StinkBait (May 31, 2004)

Johnboat said:


> With the help of a drinking buddy, I wrote and mailed a profane letter (long before email) to a recently broke up ex high school girlfriend. She lived at home then and her mother intercepted it, read it but did not tell her about it. (I am pretty sure the envelope gave away that it was written while intoxicated.) Years later her mother showed it to her and she called me. I think I was a college senior then...and engaged to another lady. I profusely apologized, admitted immaturity and idiocy, not ready for our relationship, etc. I think she accepted the apology, but who knows. She was a very nice, good looking girl who I really liked during our time together. She certainly didnt deserve my stupid letter. It was a horrible thing to do and I still get chills thinking I actually did that.


Ouch!


----------



## greenhornet (Apr 21, 2010)

Too many to list but here's a quick one-while staying at a resort in Ixtapa I drank so much I didn't sleep in my bed one night and not in the good way.
night one-so drunk couldn't figure out the card swipey thing so the marble floor right outside the door looked comfy enough
night two-so drunk didn't make it anywhere my room and slept in a chase lounge at the pool
night three-so drunk I fell asleep in an overflowing bathtub

You would have thought I would have learned at some point....but naaaaa


----------



## Worm Drowner (Sep 9, 2010)

I can name you hundreds of stupid things I did drunk, but I can't really name you one_ smart_ thing I did. That's why I quit drinking all together two years ago.


----------



## lastcast fishin (Feb 1, 2012)

*goats*

Bought 300 goats.


----------



## Tortuga (May 21, 2004)

Worm Drowner said:


> I can name you hundreds of stupid things I did drunk, but I can't really name you one_ smart_ thing I did. *That's why I quit drinking all together two years ago.*


Seeing that you are now 47...that would make you 45 when you quit.. Me too, exactly.. Extensive study on my part has determined that this is the exact age that a man's brain finally kicks in... I have numerous amigos that will attest to the accuracy of this factoid...

Congrats..by the way.. Don't ya miss those hangovers and shakes ??:biggrin:


----------



## txgoddess (Sep 21, 2007)

Tortuga said:


> Seeing that you are now 47...that would make you 45 when you quit.. Me too, exactly.. *Extensive study on my part has determined that this is the exact age that a man's brain finally kicks in*... I have numerous amigos that will attest to the accuracy of this factoid...
> 
> Congrats..by the way.. Don't ya miss those hangovers and shakes ??:biggrin:


I disagree. Case in point: trodery.


----------



## Tortuga (May 21, 2004)

txgoddess said:


> I disagree. Case in point: trodery.


Well..point well taken, Goddess...But ya gotta remember that Trod is a 'late bloomer'... He'll be along shortly....


----------



## sharksurfer66 (Sep 17, 2005)

Ask me again in three years when the "Statute of Limitations" has expired.


----------



## scend irie (Oct 28, 2011)

One of my crazier : I exited Mexico through the entrance to Mexico. The stop signs weren't facing my direction, so I didn't. The officiales on both sides of the border were either stunned or laughing. At 4:30AM there was zero traffic going either way.


----------



## Tortuga (May 21, 2004)

Hooked Up said:


> Wasn't me , BUT, I seem to remember a very old post on 2cool about "webmaster tipping" . Still LMAO about that one.


LOL..got my curiosity up about that one, Guy.. About halfway thru the thread are 'full instructions' on 'webmaster tipping'.....

http://www.2coolfishing.com/ttmbforum/showthread.php?t=12683&highlight=webmaster+tipping


----------



## lordbater (May 21, 2004)

scend irie said:


> One of my crazier : I exited Mexico through the entrance to Mexico. The stop signs weren't facing my direction, so I didn't. The officiales on both sides of the border were either stunned or laughing. At 4:30AM there was zero traffic going either way.


I did almost the same thing, except they weren't near as happy about it.. Plus the car we were in needed a screwdriver to start it and open the trunk...
maybe not the same thing, we ran out of beer somewhere around Ensenada on our way back..

a


----------



## scend irie (Oct 28, 2011)

lordbater said:


> I did almost the same thing, except they weren't near as happy about it.. Plus the car we were in needed a screwdriver to start it and open the trunk...
> maybe not the same thing, we ran out of beer somewhere around Ensenada on our way back..
> 
> a


 On the way down to Mexico, I threw off all the rubber on the passenger front tire but it stayed inflated. Didn't feel like changing it and could stil run 70. By the time I got home in the States it looked like a bird nest but was still holding air. One of those blessed nights.


----------



## birdnester (May 21, 2004)

I, like Walking Jack, have an Okinawan Benjo ditch story.....don't remember much about the sordid details....but was 19 at the time and "Hittin the Ville" every night....this particular morning...woke up stinko in a benjo ditch with two little kids pee-ing on me. Life changing moment for the better....cuz that's about how low you can go.


----------



## Gary (May 21, 2004)

Diving off the Henry Ford Bridge in 1972 in Long Beach while using, well, an ergot from a grain fungus. I saw French Fries.


----------



## chapman53559 (Jun 19, 2009)

I used to have an 84 Bronco that we would jump roads in. I jumped across Westimer on Gessner in H town once. I got pulled over doing 78 in a 35 with an empty 18 pk of Bud. I had put all the empties back in the box and the cop never checked. I have also jumped across hwy 60 in Wharton using the train tracks.
I had a scary moment coming back to San Marcos from Mexico too. I had the cruise set at 75 and dosed off right before the Border Patrol check point. Those bright florescent light woke me up ,but I slid half way through the stop. The officers were not impressed with the rubber I left. My roommate was passed out in the back seat and his girlfriend was in the front. They made us get out and sit on the curb. I thought I was screwed. My roomie wouldn't wake up and the officer said if he didn't get out he was going to jail. I grabbed his boots and drug him out on the sidewalk. then the dope dog went crazy in my truck because of some shotgun shells. For some reason the BPs let his girlfriend drive us after a sever butt chewing. I dosed off again and woke up to her doing 75 down the middle of the grass median about 15 miles down the road. By that time I had had enough Adrenalin I guess, because we made it home without further incident. 
Man I could go on and on.


----------



## Porky (Nov 1, 2006)

I take the 5th amendment .
On the grounds I may incriminate myself.


----------



## Bigj (Jul 22, 2007)

Im glad there were no video back then I be in deep kaka


----------



## HarborHustler (Nov 30, 2011)

ahhh those were the days... however the state of texas has asked me to never speak of said times ever again. 

hey... dont i get a lawyer?


----------



## Long Pole (Jun 5, 2008)

I know of someone that likes to post when he's toast.


----------



## htalamant (Mar 31, 2009)

Hotrod said:


> Ive done some crazy stuff Id rather not say, lol.
> 
> Heres a girl I rolled up on at 2am on 59. Passed out on the shoulder, hung in her seat belt, and in her own vomit. Car running, I look inside and didnt see anyone else. When the cops showed up they open the passenger side door to find another girl passed out in her vomit, and there was vomit all over the dash and seats. These were very good looking young women when I saw them the next day. It coulda been dangerous for them if the wrong person stopped by on them. They had their purses and other valuables in the car.


*I just wanna chime in on this one.....As "cute" as they may seem, it's people like these who were responsible for the death of a couple of my personal friends. I see absolutely nothing funny whatsoever in this picture whatsoever. They were not only a danger to themselves and others but the least of their worries were their purses and valuables.

On the flip side of that coin, I'm glad you got there to make sure that nothing happened to them or anyone else. Very good call on your part! So, for that I give you kudos Hotrod in making sure that they didn't continue on the roadway and possibly killing themselves or other people. Ok..I'll shut up now.

-Hector*


----------



## willeye (Mar 2, 2007)

almost had to knaw my arm off a few times.
was in rota spain and had a roommate pass out early so we took him back to the barracks and went back out. when we got back and opened the door a wall of water hit us. he woke and went to take a shower and passed out again sitting on the shower floor covering the drain with his arse cheek and the water running. and were the ones who got in trouble because we left him there.lol


----------



## Worm Drowner (Sep 9, 2010)

Tortuga said:


> Seeing that you are now 47...that would make you 45 when you quit.. Me too, exactly.. Extensive study on my part has determined that this is the exact age that a man's brain finally kicks in... I have numerous amigos that will attest to the accuracy of this factoid...
> 
> Congrats..by the way.. Don't ya miss those hangovers and shakes ??:biggrin:


I actually enjoy getting up on a weekend morning feeling good and even more, I like driving home after going out and knowing I have no chance of getting crosswise of the law (except for speeding, of course  ).


----------



## H2 (Jan 11, 2005)

Tortuga said:


> Seeing that you are now 47...that would make you 45 when you quit.. Me too, exactly.. Extensive study on my part has determined that this is the exact age that a man's brain finally kicks in... I have numerous amigos that will attest to the accuracy of this factoid...
> 
> Congrats..by the way.. Don't ya miss those hangovers and shakes ??:biggrin:


"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. "


----------



## BlueWaveEd (Jan 3, 2007)

A very long time ago at Cubi Point in the Phillipines, the Aussie Airdales came to our barracks with a cruise box full of Aussie beer. It was a grand time. I woke up about noon the next day in the weeds under a big tree. It was all I could do to get up and walk. Apparently as I was told cause I did not remember a thing, one of the biggest Aussies said something rather derogatory about Texas and my little butt took a swing at him. Right before I connected 4 of my bestest friends grabbed me up and ran to the door where they went 1..... 2..... 3... and threw me as far as they could. Said I made a perfect landing on my butt. Hence the difficulty walking. Sick bay was real sympathetic. Yeah right. Take 2 aspirin and call us in the morning.


----------



## Smackdaddy53 (Nov 4, 2011)

Aww man, theres lots of those times...the worst that i REMEMBER is taking a leak in the parking lot of a bar, turning around and straight up falling eyebrow first on a concrete curb then running through the bar to the bathroom to soak up the blood with a few hundred paper towels. There was a solid blood trail from outside all ghe way to the bathroom. I needed stitches but never got them. Heres the morning after pic...good thing my face broke my fall


-mac-


----------



## SSST (Jun 9, 2011)

Ok, being from the beer drinking capital of Tx, I've had my share of not too proud of moments, a few times wizzing in closets, couches, etc. Of course these are things you figure out the next day, the one incident that will always stand out is when i was coming home from a dance when i was 18, we live a little ways outta town so apparently i had enough sense to figure out i wasn't gonna make it, anyways i awoke to a knock on my truck's window about 5am, when i came to there was a deputy shining his light on me asking me if i was ok, that was about the time i lifted my foot off the brake and began moving, yes i fell asleep in the ditch, vehicle running, heater full blast with the brake on. Long story short, the deputy knew me (this is Shiner), told me to get my arse home and that was that, he still reminds me of that 22 years later.


----------



## ComancheRemmers (Nov 17, 2010)

SSST, got another shinerite right hear, may i ask your name sir


----------



## CoolChange (May 21, 2004)

Hooked Up said:


> Wasn't me , BUT, I seem to remember a very old post on 2cool about "webmaster tipping" . Still LMAO about that one.


That was the scariest thing I ever did, not the stupidest! And if any of my friends are still hovering: No stories, lies or picture grenades!


----------



## sotexhookset (Jun 4, 2011)

Morkovsky? Please say nooooo!


----------



## CoolChange (May 21, 2004)

Tortuga said:


> LOL..got my curiosity up about that one, Guy.. About halfway thru the thread are 'full instructions' on 'webmaster tipping'.....
> 
> http://www.2coolfishing.com/ttmbforum/showthread.php?t=12683&highlight=webmaster+tipping


Good find, Jim! That refreshed a lot of good memories and some weird ones.


----------



## DickyT (Jan 17, 2012)

Back in 1968-76 my brother and myself would go down to Nuevo Laredo every weekend (got paid to go). We went down one time and took 3 friends with us for a 3 day weekend of carousing and hot senoritas. We were 18 years old. After about 8-10 hours of fun in the Zona, we were headed back to the Del Camino Motel. I had to relieve myself so I pulled over and got out of my car and did my business. Never even entered my mind where I had stopped.

Well before I had finished the task at hand, red lights were flashing. I had just relieved myself on the statue of Miguel Hidalgo. For those that aren't aware, Miguel Hidalgo is considered the Father of the Nation of Mexico.

You have not lived until you have spent 3 nights in the old Nuevo Laredo jail. As friendly as the citizens of Nuevo Laredo are, I had on amigos for those 3 days. Only ****** there. About 20 people in an approx 10 X 20 foot cell. No water, no food, no toilet, no chair, no bed and every time I moved, I found out that I was invading someone elses space. Worst place in the world to be with a hang-over.

Kept sober for the next couple of trips down.


----------



## CoolChange (May 21, 2004)

Gary said:


> Diving off the Henry Ford Bridge in 1972 in Long Beach while using, well, an ergot from a grain fungus. I saw French Fries.


Why do I really, really believe this?! :biggrin::spineyes:


----------



## carryyourbooks (Feb 13, 2009)

chapman53559 said:


> I used to have an 84 Bronco that we would jump roads in. I jumped across Westimer on Gessner in H town once. I got pulled over doing 78 in a 35 with an empty 18 pk of Bud. I had put all the empties back in the box and the cop never checked. I have also jumped across hwy 60 in Wharton using the train tracks.
> I had a scary moment coming back to San Marcos from Mexico too. I had the cruise set at 75 and dosed off right before the Border Patrol check point. Those bright florescent light woke me up ,but I slid half way through the stop. The officers were not impressed with the rubber I left. My roommate was passed out in the back seat and his girlfriend was in the front. They made us get out and sit on the curb. I thought I was screwed. My roomie wouldn't wake up and the officer said if he didn't get out he was going to jail. I grabbed his boots and drug him out on the sidewalk. then the dope dog went crazy in my truck because of some shotgun shells. For some reason the BPs let his girlfriend drive us after a sever butt chewing. I dosed off again and woke up to her doing 75 down the middle of the grass median about 15 miles down the road. By that time I had had enough Adrenalin I guess, because we made it home without further incident.
> Man I could go on and on.


this made me remember of a night a trio of us spent the evening at mo's place in katy. at the time, we lived in stafford. my buddy was supposed to be the designated driver, but he passed out, so cop at the door told me to drive. i did pretty good all the way until i took the Meadows Place exit off of 59. i was driving a very fast camaro and decided to spin the tires in front of the cops. long story short, the whole police force for meadows was there within a minute and somehow or another, i passed a field sobriety test.

lesson learned: don't race cops.


----------



## SolarScreenGuy (Aug 15, 2005)

DickyT said:


> Back in 1968-76 my brother and myself would go down to Nuevo Laredo every weekend (got paid to go). We went down one time and took 3 friends with us for a 3 day weekend of carousing and hot senoritas. We were 18 years old. After about 8-10 hours of fun in the Zona, we were headed back to the Del Camino Motel. I had to relieve myself so I pulled over and got out of my car and did my business. Never even entered my mind where I had stopped.
> 
> Well before I had finished the task at hand, red lights were flashing. I had just relieved myself on the statue of Miguel Hidalgo. For those that aren't aware, Miguel Hidalgo is considered the Father of the Nation of Mexico.
> 
> ...


Yea buddy that jail is some kind a nightmare! I guess if someone from the outside does not bring you food, you simply starve. I conned a taco from a local hombre when I was in there. I also witnessed the policia beat the daylights out of several prisoners. I was sure I was gonna be next because I called them every name in the book when I was still feelin' 10 feet tall and bullet proof. But after I came to with a hangover from hell, I tried to get invisible.


----------



## fwoodwader (Jul 18, 2008)

Drove home from a buddies house just six sheets to the wind, I remember walking out of his door and waking up the next day and that is it. To this day I have no idea how I made it home in one peace.

Youthful ignorance, now when I got to a bar I'll have two beers and that is it, I used to put away 10+ crown and cokes in a hour like it was nothing.


----------



## SSST (Jun 9, 2011)

ComancheRemmers said:


> SSST, got another shinerite right hear, may i ask your name sir


Check your PM's, i'm pretty sure we know each other.


----------



## iridered2003 (Dec 12, 2005)

Long Pole said:


> I know of someone that likes to post when he's toast.


 looking in the mirror there lilpole?


----------



## KEN KERLEY (Nov 13, 2006)

In the same night, jumped on a guy that was about 6'2" and weighed about 275 - I was about 125#. Later, my friends found me outside playing in the snow BUCK NAKED.


----------



## CORNHUSKER (Jul 12, 2004)

Purest form of, lack of character, known to man-kind!!!


----------



## mercenarymedic2105 (Jun 8, 2011)

17, started around lunch time on a Friday in the Southbelt, woke up Sunday afternoon outside of Baton Rouge....really have nothing else to add because I don't know


----------



## Donchi (Jan 16, 2012)

*Drunken bar fight*

While stationed in okinawa I got a meritorius promo to E4. Me and a couple of my leathernecked friends got drunk on soju and I knocked out a 1st Lt. Come monday morning my Msgt. called me in the office and gave me a pair of Lcpl. chevrons and told me to get out of his sight! I didnt get into any trouble because the louie couldnt I D me but that incident followed me the rest of my time in the Marine Corps.... It was worth it!


----------



## ByGodTx (Sep 15, 2010)

Stole a police car....yes really.

A quick pretty funny story. A buddy was celebrating his birthday at a bar. His friends get his keys and hide a drunk girl in the back seat of his car to give him a birthday "surprise." Well the next morning he is pulling out of his driveway for work and up pops the girl He told me he just pushed her head down so his wife wouldn't see her.


----------



## ksk (Aug 9, 2008)

After a night of drinking in Cam Rahn Bay,several of us stole a MP jeep and drove it to the water edge of our PBR.Once on the boat,someone said our finger prints were all over the jeep[?].I grabed a m-79 ,swam back to shore and shot the jeep! The explosion knocked me to the ground as I was only 20 yards away.It also lite the area up.I swam back to the boat and we hauled butt out of there.We could see the lights of MP jeeps coming to the explosion.We went to the other side of the bay and layed low.Later that morning,I discovered a piece of metal in my wrist.Needless to say,I did not put in for a Heart!


----------



## Gary (May 21, 2004)

CoolChange said:


> Why do I really, really believe this?! :biggrin::spineyes:


----------



## lordbater (May 21, 2004)

ksk said:


> After a night of drinking in Cam Rahn Bay,several of us stole a MP jeep and drove it to the water edge of our PBR.Once on the boat,someone said our finger prints were all over the jeep[?].I grabed a m-79 ,swam back to shore and shot the jeep! The explosion knocked me to the ground as I was only 20 yards away.It also lite the area up.I swam back to the boat and we hauled butt out of there.We could see the lights of MP jeeps coming to the explosion.We went to the other side of the bay and layed low.Later that morning,I discovered a piece of metal in my wrist.Needless to say,I did not put in for a Heart!


That's pretty hard to top...

a


----------



## Hammerhead (Jun 16, 2004)

In '78 after waaay to much te-kill-ya at SWT, I climbed the horse statue waving my hat, and shouting yeehaw. I woke up with a huge knot on my head in the cactus bed below.


----------



## iridered2003 (Dec 12, 2005)

lordbater said:


> That's pretty hard to top...
> 
> a


NAW, i got drunk one night and slept with a fat chick:cheers::cheers:


----------



## lordbater (May 21, 2004)

iridered2003 said:


> NAW, i got drunk one night and slept with a fat chick:cheers::cheers:


What's yer excuse for the other times?


----------



## iridered2003 (Dec 12, 2005)

lordbater said:


> What's yer excuse for the other times?


only that one time bater, thats why i quit drinking:dance:


----------



## paslaw0311 (Apr 19, 2011)

Hueco Falls and Slumber Falls in a tube on the Guadalupe River. Hueco was planned, Slumber because I still hadnt re-located my tube from the first, and hadnt located the bank. Young and stupid


----------



## bigpun91 (Oct 2, 2005)

iridered2003 said:


> NAW, i got drunk one night and slept with a fat chick:cheers::cheers:


 I have done that sober


----------



## sea sick (Feb 9, 2006)

I was in Indianapolis during Indy 500 week. I was in the Marine Corps for some training there. It's like Mardi Gras during that week. It gets crazy!

Well,at about midnight,I was at a real nice pub/bar. It was 10 bucks to get in,nickle drinks. The place was packed,like the fire marshal just has to look thru the window and it's getting shut down.

About midnight,after about 20 crown and cokes and numerous shots from random people, I puke while sitting on a bar stool,puke gets on me and everyone within 5 feet of me. Like a puke grenade.

So myself and the 3 other buddies leave. Cuzzzz the security folks said we had to cuz if we didn't I was going to jail! While walking thru the streets,I had to pee. So they had 2 rows of bout 20 port o cans lined up in this alley. So they open the door for me. I go in,lock the door.......

It's now 0700,I wake up,on the floor in this can, to hear them beating and kicking the door. I spent the night in that thing,used the toilet paper rolls like a pillow, I was in there for about 6 hours I guess.

We had to check in at 0730. They had my clothes and a razor. I checked in with blood nicks all over my face, I was smelling like puke, port o can and ****** !!! Buddies said they beat on the door,but I wouldn't open it. One of the guys climbed up,peeked thru the air vent and saw me passed out on the floor. So they went and partied. Came back and got me in the morning.


----------



## lordbater (May 21, 2004)

nice, what are friends for..

a


----------



## the hook (Aug 8, 2011)

OK, I guess statute of limitations are up now so.....I might add here a favorite Eastwood quote...."A mans got to know his limitations"....

1. I "hung out" about 25 mi from home as a young adult, so made for some looooong, laaaaate nights....One time cruising up I 80 thru Pa I fell asleep and hit the guard rail...only bent in the fender and bumper a trifle...This was about 6am....2 guys stopped and offered help, but when the State Police came down the other direction(divided hwy) they boogied...Statie ask what happened? Gave him a line and luckily he believed me and helped bend the fender out. Bumper, I had to hook the guard rail and back up a lil bit:biggrin: with his assistance

2. After the bars closed I would go to friends houses and conk out. One Jan nite I went to ones house and he wasn't home, but I knew where he HAD TO BE. We had a hunting cabin up in the woods of the Poconos in E Pa. I knew he was there, so off I go...This being the 70s and 3am, nothing was open, so I did not need gas, as it wasn't far....Yep, run out about 1/2 way there...no problem, just take a nap, in the middle of the road till someone comes...Did I mention Pa, mountains, January??? Woke up about froze to death....I had my ski stuff, so put my boots on and ski parka...woke up freeeeeezing....Put my shoes back on and walked about 5 miles to a main road... Guy came by finally and gave me a lift to another friends about daylight. When we went back, car was gone....went to nearest gas station to call ploice, and there is my car...someone turned it in to police, as it was in the road....The keys were in ignition, but didn't start?? Oh yeh, out of gas...$20 tow bill too and they ripped my cowl off the front with the truck (69 Pontiac Catalina)......

3. Cruising up I 80 about 3am (notice a pattern here?) I pass the town of Scotrun, where the State Police barracks are located. You can't see them, but they are there, and being 3am, what and where else is there anything happening except the highways? Well, as things go I cruise past an entrance ramp and pass a Statie....I know he's after me...... but he aint catchin me! Off I go, this time in my 69 GTO, that I've had around and back up to 25mph before letting off...That's the last thing I remembered till I woke up home in bed???.... I've often wondered??

4. OK, last for now...Left the bar after closing(another pattern?) and as guys do, I headed towards a "friends" house for a late nite romp. She lived in a house that a lot of college people rent out too. Sorta like a boarding house a bit out of town(E Stroudsburg) I'd been there before and when I left she requested that I leave thru the window!!! Now, mind you, this is the 2nd floor!! Out on the porch roof and down the trallace...no problem...what a drunk guy will go thru....Well, I head over one night a LOT later than normal and the front door is locked??? No problem, as I know the "back way"....Up the trellace, across the roof, and open the window. Dark, but no thing....I stumble thru the window and ***???? Empty!!! Aparently she had moved and neglected to tell me! And believe me, I'm glad it was empty...Back out and down at a record pace....I can't remember what ever happened but I had to wake up half the house....


As I typed these I remembered a lot more, like being thrown out of New York....Yep, the state! Not just a bar or town...the WHOLE STATE! Ron White would be proud, but that's another story.....Oh yeh, then I moved to Houston....Had to quit after I got married in 77 if I wanted my marriage to last...34 yrs on 2/12


----------



## Pablo (May 21, 2004)

Rolled a truck in college. Luckily, all I had were a few stitches and my roommate was ok. Never, ever been drunk like that before or since. To say we were lucky is an understatement.

One of the funniest things I saw in college involved a good friend of mine. We were at a party about 2 miles from my apartment, and my buddy was getting majorly toasted. He kept saying he was going home over and over, so we took his keys away. He got p-od, and cussed us, saying that he'd just walk home. Well, he disappeared. When we got back to our apartment hours later, he's lying there on our doormat passed out. His clothes are shredded, blood all over them and cactus thorns everywhere. We got him up, he's mumbling that he's ok, and managed to get him a pillow and blanket on the living room floor. The next day, he finally comes to and remembers what happened. Turns out that he did walk to our place, through a pasture and had a Charolais bull chase him. He's running from the bull and plows into a barbwire fence which cuts him to pieces. He gets untangled and staggers off...right into a pearbush. LMAO He pulled thorns out for DAYS!


----------



## sun burn (Jun 12, 2008)

One time me and my brother got a bottle of souther comfort. We said we were going to share it. his gf had a problem with it so I drank the whole thing by myself. Last thing I remember before I passed out was go head first into the door cause I had to "let the dogs out". When I came to in the morning all I could smell was puke. When I got the courage to get up and walk around all over the place was puke. It sucked cleaning it up. now I don't drink southern comfort anymore it just don't taste the same lol I stick to crown black it goes down a lot smother


----------



## Sounding_7th (Dec 20, 2011)

sun burn said:


> One time me and my brother got a bottle of souther comfort. We said we were going to share it. his gf had a problem with it so I drank the whole thing by myself. Last thing I remember before I passed out was go head first into the door cause I had to "let the dogs out". When I came to in the morning all I could smell was puke. When I got the courage to get up and walk around all over the place was puke. It sucked cleaning it up. now I don't drink southern comfort anymore it just don't taste the same lol I stick to crown black it goes down a lot smother


Shouldn't you be at school??


----------



## Ernest (May 21, 2004)

This one time, when I was in jr. high, we huffed all this paint, and I got the crazy idea of holding a two day boycott of gasoline purchases in order to protest the high cost of fuel.


----------



## Sounding_7th (Dec 20, 2011)

Ernest said:


> This one time, when I was in jr. high, we huffed all this paint, and I got the crazy idea of holding a two day boycott of gasoline purchases in order to protest the high cost of fuel.


You did that too????:headknock:headknock


----------



## jebatu (May 22, 2006)

I don't know, I don't wanna know and if you try and tell me I ain't gonna listen.


----------



## 61Bubbletop (Apr 29, 2011)

The best one I can actually remember is jumping off of the 2nd floor balcony into the hotel swimming pool in Mazatlan, Mexico. Hit bottom, but luckily not hard enough to get hurt.


----------



## SpecklFinAddict (Dec 19, 2004)

trodery said:


> Yeah.... You bunch of drunken fools.... I don't drink! <snicker>


I've been accused of quite a few things...but I'm quite certain, I did none of them!


----------



## TU MO KASSTS (Feb 12, 2010)

broke a cinder block in half with my knee... needless to say I couldn't walk right for the next 2 weeks

and climbed around on the roof of a 6 story building

and waded the bait out to go shark fishing at dusk in surfside (fastest i've ever swam to shore in my life)


----------



## capt mullet (Nov 15, 2008)

I woke up still half drunk and the girl was "mooing" at me!!LMAO


----------



## Calmday (Jul 7, 2005)

Ernest said:


> This one time, when I was in jr. high, we huffed all this paint, and I got the crazy idea of holding a two day boycott of gasoline purchases in order to protest the high cost of fuel.


ROTFLMAO :rotfl:
Now that was funny.


----------



## Bobby_G (Jan 1, 2012)

I went to a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's...I was pretty drunk...


----------



## Fishing Gal2880 (Feb 1, 2012)

My family and some friends rented some cabins @ Kickapoo Creek in Livingston for my 30th birthday and we had been on the boat all day and decided to take the party back on land. We were fishing on the bank and NOTHING was biting so me, one of my friends and her husband rented a jon boat to troll along (my mom said she would give a $1 for the 1st fish lol)....This is something I never have done because growing up my dad always set up troutlines every year and its just something you don't do, but I blame Bud Light on this one. I saw a troutline with something splashing around it so I told them to take me over to it, my friend was saying "don't do it Lisa & the husband was laughing telling to do it" I got the tiny fish off and I remember how hard it was getting off, very difficult. Anyway, I'm happy now because I get a dollar for the 1st fish (hey she didn't say HOW you get the fish) but then I saw another splash a little ways down and decided to grab the troutline and pull myself over to it, as I was alomost there I felt a sharp pain in my left palm, it was a dang hook lodged in my hand! I yelled for something sharp and he hands my pliers. SERIOUSLY???? I don't even remember what we got to cut it because all I was worried about was what my dad is going to say. I tried pulling it out twice but the barb was so big it wouldn't budge. I told them that I'm going to say I was fishing around the troutline and thats how it happened but I needed to keep the fish for evidence, so I held on to the fish and they took my back to land. As I get out of the boat I'm already yelling my story real fast and my brother cut me off, screaming She robbed the troutline!!!!" My dad poured me a shot of Maker's Mark and said, "Edith (Bunker), were going to the ER. The only time I teared up was when the doc started sawing the hook and my hand wasn't numb yet. $3000 later I'm back at camp with a cold one in my hand! Believe you me, I will never ever, ever ever ever do that again.

Ps. I got to keep the hook


----------



## StrikerX (Aug 31, 2009)

ksk said:


> After a night of drinking in Cam Rahn Bay,several of us stole a MP jeep and drove it to the water edge of our PBR.Once on the boat,someone said our finger prints were all over the jeep[?].I grabed a m-79 ,swam back to shore and shot the jeep! The explosion knocked me to the ground as I was only 20 yards away.It also lite the area up.I swam back to the boat and we hauled butt out of there.We could see the lights of MP jeeps coming to the explosion.We went to the other side of the bay and layed low.Later that morning,I discovered a piece of metal in my wrist.Needless to say,I did not put in for a Heart!


Whoa...


----------



## Bukkskin (Oct 21, 2009)

Well, I've done plenty of stupid stuff while tore up. But this was a good friend of mine. We were crossing back to the U.S. from Matamoras during spring break a lot of years ago. There was probably 10 of us hanging off of my buddies convertable car. Customs asks if we have anything to declare, like any illegal drugs and such. I said, "No sir" but my liquired up friend says, "Yes, I have a pound of cocaine stashed in my arse":spineyes:. Really?????
I thought, man this is not going to be good. One of the agents kinda giggled and said, "Is that right, son?". They snatched him up out of the back of the car, and I don't think his feet ever touched the ground on the way inside. About 30 minutes later he reappears. Ghost white and Real quiet. I said, "What happened?". He just shook his head and didn't say nuthin. LOL. He never would talk about it, just said he didn't remember anything. 
Can you say, "Cavity Search"
LMAO


----------



## ComeFrom? (May 21, 2004)

During my 2nd and final DWI 30 years ago I was cuffed and placed on the front seat (passenger's side) of a TX. State Troopers black car... at about 2:00 a.m.

After about half way back to jail I remembered I took a handful of ex-lax earlier that evening when all of a sudden, like an up-side-down volcano...I mean all over the place....and was he MAD!! 'nuff said! LOL!


----------



## FishinCowboy (Sep 8, 2010)

I read this thread and laughed my tail off!!!
Other than that, because I am not sure who all you people are, 
Keeping my trap shut!!!
Funny stuff


----------



## FishinCowboy (Sep 8, 2010)

Ok, quick one
Stopped drinking at 17, started again at 42.
Wife asked me why I started, and I said
"If I had of known how much easier it made living with you, I would have started a long time ago"


----------



## chubri777 (Aug 11, 2005)

Was staying at Garner for our senior trip and chugged a quart of Southern Comfort for $100. When I was finally able to load myself into my friends old '66 chevy van, we headed back to Garner from Neal's. The seat belt was hanging out and dragging on the road and dummy me wouldn't let him pull over because I could open the door and pull it back in. No, I actually couldn't, and luckily he was slowing down to pull over when I left the vehicle. He said he was probably down to 30-35 when I fell out and rolled down the hill, a rock studded hill if I remember it right. I woke up 2 days later with blood all over me and my right knee the size of a basketball. I learned several valuable lessons that trip.


----------

